Morber High Life

The Wild Horse

2012-01-07T15:32:00.002-06:00

Cavan's submission (see previous post for background):

TheWild Horse

byCavan

Chapter 1

Back in 1870, Jack Woodman and hiswife, Alice, were traveling in the countryside of Harrisburg,Illinois. They were riding in a buggy in the forest during the fall. Jack and Alice had a team of three horses, but one of the horsestripped over a sharp rock. They went to the doctor, who told them thehorse was lame. Before they leave, they stay and listen to a storyabout a wild horse. Jack and Alice thought they could perhaps catchthe wild horse (because a new horse would be too expensive). Theyalso hear of a horse missing from a rich man; there is a handsomereward for the horse's return! First, they decide to search for themissing horse. With the reward, they're not sure if they'll just buya new horse or try to tame the wild horse. Putting saddles on theremaining two horses from their team, they set off on horseback.

Chapter 2

During the search, it starts to rainhard. After a big storm, they get stuck in some mud in the middle ofa pond. They can not just hop out of the pond. Jack remembers that hebrought a long rope. He spots a big boulder, makes the rope into alasso and throws it over the boulder. He pulls himself and Alice out,who were now both cold and wet. But, the horses they were ridingwere still stuck in the mud because they were too heavy to pull outof the pond. So, the Woodmans had to continue their search by foot.

Chapter 3

When they find the missing horse, it isin a clearing by a cabin, closer to the town of Harrisburg, Illinois.They say to themselves, “It's probably the thieves' house, whokidnapped the horse.” Jack and Alice decide that if they rescuethe horse and turn in the robber, they would probably get more rewardmoney. They creep quietly toward the horse, who doesn't even make atiny whinny. Alice gets on the horse, while Jack leads them back tothe pond (where their other two horses were still stuck). Jack takesthe rope and makes it into a double-ended lasso, putting one end overthe missing horse and one end over a horse from their team . He urgesthe horse to back up, and after a minute, he pulls the trapped horseout of the pond. Jack then does the same for the other horse.

Chapter 4

Once they have all the horses free,they go back into Harrisburg and ask for directions to the rich man'shouse. When they get the directions, they return the horse, feed andstable it, and receive the reward! Next, they show him where thethief lives and bring along the sheriff and policeman, who surroundthe cabin. The sheriff knocks on the door and the thief comes outquietly, not expecting to see the police. The sheriff ties him up andthrows him in jail. The couple felt proud for helping the rich manand were happy to receive extra reward money too.

Chapter 5

The next morning, the Woodmans begintheir search for the wild horse. In their journey, they come acrossa wild river and wonder how they will get across. Jack and Alicethink together about what to do and decide to jump across the riveron horseback, but will they make it? They back up their horses, thenstart the horses galloping as fast as they can go. When they nearthe river's edge, they jump. Alice's horse almost makes it across,but his back legs land in the river and the current is too strong forthe horse. The river pulls both the horse and Alice in! The manthinks quickly and urges his horse forward, to get in front of thewoman's horse. When he is in front, Jack spots a tree stump on theother side of the river and throws his long lasso over it. Hetightens the rope, and as Alice and her horse approach the rope line,it stops them from going down a water fall in front of them. Thewoman urges her horse to get on the river bank. The horse tries hisbest and succeeds!

Chapter 6

They ride alonginto another forest and come to a clearing, with a quiet streamrunning through it. The Woodmans and their horses are hot, tiredand hungry. They stop to drink at the stream and then go to pickwildberries for a meal later. When they return, they rest in thegrass and eat some of the berries they found, while the horsescontinue drinking from the stream. After Alice feeds the horses somecarrots from her pack, Jack gets out a little tent he packed that isbig enough for him and his wife to sleep in.

Chapter 7

Jack finds hissmall ax and goes to chop down some firewood for the night. When hewas finished, nightfall was only a few minutes away. He began to rubsome rocks and wood together to start a fire. After a few smallsparks begin to fall, the flames then grew into a big fire. TheWoodmans go to sleep and rest from their big adventurous day.

Chapter 8

When Jack wokeup, he saw a midnight black horse, standing near their horses. Hesilently awoke Alice. Could this be the wild horse? The Woodmansbelieved it was. They tried to quietly approach the black horse, butJack stepped on a twig that snapped. The black horse turned, sawthem and ran off into the woods. The Woodmans quickly packed uptheir camp and chased after the wild horse.

Chapter 9

They come uponanother dusty clearing, near the edge of the forest and spot the wildhorse. Jack creeps over to the horse, trying not to startle him. Ashe approached the wild horse, he gently reaches out his hand to tryand pet the horse. The horse nervously backs up, unsure of Jack'shand. Jack slowly follows the horse, but this time, the horse stays. Alice then steadily walks over to where Jack and the wild horsestand. She continues to slowly walk over to the horse, who onceagain, backs away a little bit. She calmly continues and holds upher hand. Alice then gets close enough to softly pet the wild horse. While she is petting the horse and showing him kindness, Jackswiftly went to get a saddle. As his wife keeps the horse peaceful,Jack calmly places the saddle on the horse. After gently tighteningthe saddle, he tries to carefully climb on the horse, who shakes Jackoff. Jack tries again, but this time he gives the horse a carrotwhile he climbs up. Jack succeeds in staying on the horse this time!

Chapter 10

The Woodmanswere both glad they had found the wild black horse and were excitedto take him to Champaign, Illinois (where they were going to live andstart a family). Jack's cousin, an engineer, had previously offeredthe couple a ride on the train back to the Champaign depot. Theycould keep their horses on a special trailer car. The Woodmans werelooking forward to an easier trip and settling down in Champaigntogether.

The Cold Night

2012-01-07T15:28:00.000-06:00

Ah, our neglected blog . . .

Cavan took a class earlier this Fall learning about settlers and particularly their presence here in central Illinois. For a final project, he and I were asked to write a brief fictional story dealing with some of the things we learned in the class. Here's my contribution, with Cavan's to follow:

TheCold Night

Jacob could see his breath in front ofhim.

It wasn't uncommon in the midst of thisharsh winter, but, as he sat shivering under a threadbare quilt infront of the dying embers of the hearth-fire, the feeling in the pitof his stomach wasn't just hunger: it was the prospect of completeloss.

Jacob glanced to his left, hoping thatthe empty woodpile would have replenished itself in the last minutesince he had previously looked. Only a few splinters remained; onecould hardly call the remnants “kindling.”

His mother moaned softly. Jacob jumpedup and walked over to the palette on which she lay. He placed hiscold hand upon her forehead. The warmth of her feverish skin was arelief to his numb fingers, but his worry took any pleasurablesensation away. The fever had not improved, but had grown worse inthe past few hours.

He marveled at the fact that one couldsustain such a high temperature in the midst of a freezing cabin, butsuch was the nature of the sickness. She was curled up on the floor,her body trembling with the cold and groaning from the pain oftyphoid fever.

Jacob prayed over her again, seekingdivine help that his mother may gain some relief. The fever hadpersisted for days, and his father, braving the treacherous weatherto seek medical help, had yet to return after 2 days. Jacob had beengiven instructions to care for his mother, feeding her from theirnearly-bare food supply, and giving her the occasional ice-chip,taken from the icicles hanging from their roof, to keep her hydrated.

But Jacob was not sure how he was tosustain the fire at this point; the temperature had dropped evenfurther since his father left, and the woodpile, stacked five-feethigh only days ago, was no more. The family was spending their yearas homesteaders in Illinois, and found themselves unprepared for theferocity of this particular mid-western winter. The wood was gone,food was low . . . all hope of survival seemed nearly lost.

Jacob tried not to fall into despair.He looked around the cabin, trying to find the next item that couldbe tossed into the fire. Anything to keep it going.

The room was dark, but his eyes settledon his most prized possession: his toy train, a gift from his parentsbefore they made their trek from Georgia to Illinois. It had occupiedhim many days during the trip, and was always a pleasant diversion inthe evenings after a hard day's work with his father. It was his onlytoy.

Jacob glanced around, hoping somethingelse would find his attention . . . but nothing did. Many otherwooden items had already met their demise in the hearth. The trainwas all that was expendable.

He walked over to it, picking it up andexamining the intricate details that he had never noticed before.Though the train had clearly been assembled from “spare” piecesof wood and each side was not perfectly symmetrical, nevertheless,the maker had spent a good amount of time carefully planing the wood,sturdily assembling the train, and artfully painting a window here,some wheel spokes here. Jacob had always enjoyed the fact that itwas durable, sustaining many crashes and falls, but now he admiredthe superb craftmanship, the time and love spent making thishodge-podge of wood into a little boy's constant companion.

Jacob ran the train along the groundone last time, ignoring the numbness in his fingers. One trip aroundthe imaginary track was enough; Jacob lifted the engine, the threecars, the caboose, and quickly tossed them into the fire. At first,the embers seemed to be unaware of the train's presence, havingalready resigned itself to its fate. But after a few seconds, thewheel of the caboose ignited and soon the entire train was engulfedin flames.

The fire burned bright, and filled halfof the cabin with newfound warmth. Jacob stared into the hearth, butonly for a minute. He grabbed his quilt and laid next to his mother,her body heat warming him, and her presence comforting him. Jacobfell asleep, the occasional tear streaming down his cheek. Perhapsaided by angels, the train burned throughout the night.

Two months later, Jacob, his mother andfather were all waiting at the Champaign depot for the next train toroll in. They were expecting Jacob's uncle Adam to arrive at anyminute.

Jacob and his mother had slept safelythrough that night. His father had arrived the next morning, greetedby melting snow and the warmth of the sun. He had brought food, whichwas much needed, and medicine, which was not, as the mother'stemperature had broken that night. Mother was up and about, eager togreet her husband and hold her son.

It was now April, and Jacob was withouteven a coat in the spring weather. Far off in the distance, he heardthe shrill sound of a train whistle, and soon saw the locomotiveitself pulling into the station. A throng of people exited thetrain, many greeted by loved ones. Adam descended onto the platformand caught the leaping Jacob, who had broke into a dead run when hesaw his beloved uncle.

After a warm greeting from Jacob'sparents, Adam asked, “Jacob, would you mind carrying my bag,please?” Jacob gladly agreed. He threw the bag over his shoulder,and began to walk towards their buggy. Jacob tossed the bag in, butwas met with his Adam's gentle rebuke. “Gently, my boy! I havesomething special in there. Please take it out and show yourparents.”

Jacob breathlessly reached into the bag. . . and pulled out a beautiful, hand-made train, superior even tothe one that had been consumed in the fire.

24 in the 1990's

2010-05-17T13:37:00.006-05:00

Shan and I were both dismayed when we heard of the end of the line for one of our favorite TV series, 24. I found this video of a 24 "pilot" shot in the mid-90s. Hilarious!

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

Sicut Cervus

2010-03-10T07:38:00.003-06:00

An amazing thing happened last week at Mass.

Background info first: Very often, the choirs at St. John's will do a post-Communion meditation as the priest is cleaning the vessels at the altar. It's imperative that the director of each choir time the piece perfectly to finish before the priest is finished with the vessels; otherwise, the priest sits before the song is finished and everyone in the congregation will then rise from their kneeling position and sit down in the creaky pews. Between the shuffling, creaking, thumping of kneelers being returned to their upright position, etc., it makes for a brutal cacophony of sound right near the end of a meditative choral piece. Talk about ruining the mood.

Anyway, on Sunday, I cut our communion chant a bit short, as the priest presiding at Mass tended to be very "efficient" at cleaning the vessels, and I knew that we needed to start the post-Communion motet a bit earlier than usual. So the choir received Communion and then we started the piece. About halfway through, I started looking every 30 seconds or so to check to see where the priest was; at one point I got a sinking feeling in my stomach, as I knew that he was going to finish before we would, and the end of the piece would most likely be ruined by the congregation hurling themselves back into place. I turned back to the choir with a pained expression on my face and braced myself for the inevitable.

But it never came.

The ending of the piece was beautiful, and not a sound could be heard in the Church otherwise. I immediately looked back towards the front, and sure enough, Father had sat down . . . but the congregation stayed in place. No one had moved a muscle.

Now I've been doing choir stuff at St. John's for 7.5 years now combined, and this has NEVER happened. The congregation ALWAYS sits down . . . must have been the Holy Spirit not wanting to ruin this piece.

(No, this is not my choir! And we only did up to 3:33 of the video.)

Translation:
As a deer longs for flowing streams,
so my soul longs for you, O God. (Ps. 41(42): 1)

Spring! Spring! Spring!

2010-03-06T18:54:00.002-06:00

The last couple of days have been so wonderful here . . . sun shining, birds chirping, snow melting! Really, spring is on its way. Hooray! This winter has been long and was getting tortuous. I know that since we live in the Midwest, we are not out of the woods yet, but praise God for the glorious bit of warm-er weather we've had!!!

Every Morber is ready to get out and play, including our youngest, Sebastian, who is walking. For some reason, both my boys have been earlier-than-average walkers. However, they have also both been my "late" babies. Perhaps this means they are late to arrive, but ready to get in the action. ;)

Here is a haiku about our adventures on Thursday:

Look! Look! Spring is near . . .
Beckons us outside to play
In the mud, I fear.

Hope all of you are able to enjoy the first promises of spring as well!

Humility of Motherhood

2010-01-20T13:55:00.002-06:00

Yes, this blog has been sorely neglected these past two months. Basically, from Thanksgiving until now . . . My apologies! I am doing the best I can as a mother of 3. ;)

Today, the kiddos and I read some books on the human body and keeping ourselves healthy. With one of the books, there is an accompanying CD with various songs for children on the many amazing systems/parts of our bodies. I was looking for the CD to play in the background while the children finished a project. I knew it was either in our main CD shuffler or in the van. When I discovered it wasn't in the shuffler in the house, I said, "Well, that means it's in the van."

Cavan, my wise boy who is helping his mother chip away at the pride blocking her way to holiness, responded, "Mom, you could be wrong. Do you know why?" I left an appropriate pause waiting for what came next. Then, in a very simple and straightforward manner, he continued, "Because you're not God, Mom."

Despite my initial internal rejection of him postulating that *I* could be wrong, all I could say in response was "You're right, Cav." Good thing I have children intent on getting me to heaven! Otherwise, I'd be doomed. ;)

Teenagers' Brains

2009-11-22T17:19:00.003-06:00

Now, if I read this blurb when I was a teenager, I would have been deeply offended and mad. But having been out of my teenage years for awhile, I can see how "immature" I was (even as someone who was ahead of her years overall).

The truth of the matter is that teenagers are emotional and *still developing* as people, which includes their brains. This is why they still need parental guidance. Most importantly, this is why it could be dangerous to simply provide them with all the various "safer sex" options and then let them go wild. How can you make a "rational" decision, which could have life-long consequences when your ability to reason is not thoroughly formed?

Just food for thought.

Blog Anniversary/All Saints

2009-11-01T17:45:00.002-06:00

Friends,

We started this feeble attempt at a blog exactly three years ago today. We had talked about it for awhile and then when I came up with this clever title for it (don't let Shannon tell you she thought it up), I knew we had to move quickly.

3 years and 170+ mostly forgettable entries later, we're still here, posting . . . well, sporadically at best.

Anyway, thanks for reading and not judging our wacky ideas too harshly!

Omnes Sancti et Sanctae Dei, orate pro nobis!

Dyno-mite!

2009-10-31T09:42:00.003-05:00

Sheesh, this thing is years old now, but I just caught it the other day. It's like watching a car crash.

Just so you know the whole story . . .

http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/columns/story?id=2785830

Respecting Women, Trusting Birth

2009-10-16T22:17:00.002-05:00

I came across this first article earlier today about a mom in Arizona, pregnant with baby #4. Brief birth history for her is #1-vaginal, #2-cesarean section, #3-vaginal birth after cesarean (VBAC). Her local hospital has implemented a ban on Vaginal Births After Cesarean, or VBACs (pronounced vee-backs), in the time between birth #3 and her current pregnancy. Thus, she is no longer "allowed" to have a vaginal birth, despite having one a couple of years earlier with baby #3. The story is sad for the family, but unfortunately, not an uncommon experience in the birthing world. VBAC bans are on the rise. Check out the International Cesarean Awareness Network (ICAN) for more info.

At least Joy Szabo is not taking it lying down. I wholeheartedly applaud this mama's actions and taking responsibility of her birth experience! This situation irks me for obvious reasons (I am a VBAC-mama myself and a childbirth educator in the Bradley Method), but I think it also highlights several problems with our healthcare system. I won't bore you with a lengthy discussion, but there are a few key points I want to discuss:

Blatant disrespect of pregnant, laboring and postpartum women. I suppose this can be true of all "patients" in general. (I use quotes b/c I don't really feel a pregnant women is a patient at all. She is simply experiencing a natural, normal and healthy part of life.) Now, I have worked in hospitals and believe me, I am fully aware of the "difficult patient" (Seinfeld, anyone?). However, I do concede that, at the end of the day, it is the patients that are in charge of their health. Hence, they can either accept or decline whatever treatments they desire. The same is true for pregnant women. Women need to take control of their healthcare and start assuming responsibility for their births. While we cannot control what kind of labor/birth we are given in life, we can plan, prepare, educate ourselves, eat well, exercise and maintain positive emotional support for the process. Too many women have given up complete control of their healthcare to physicians and the medical community. Yes, doctors are trained in areas that I am not. Yes, they have more experience with medical situations than I do. However, I do have the ability to read and discuss a situation clearly. Discussions need to be taking place b/t childbearing women and their careproviders. Discussions that involve *all* the benefits and risks, alternatives to anything that pops up out of the norm, education on various procedures and options. Lastly, women need to be allowed to make their own decisions regarding their labor/birth and what is best for their babies. These discussions should NOT be happening in labor, when a woman is preoccupied and vulnerable. Positive changes in healthcare will not occur until patients truly are treated as part of their own medical team.
Imposing a more costly procedure (i.e. major abdominal surgery via c-section) for a much less costly procedure (i.e. vaginal birth). I still am baffled by a system where health insurance companies will pay 3-4x the amount of money necessary to cover a c-section when vaginal births are much, much cheaper for everyone involved. My c-section and newborn care in 2004: $12,000+, my vaginal homebirths in 2006 and 2009: roughly $2,000 each. I should also add that I did not pay one dime for my c-section and yet, we have paid for our two homebirths out of pocket because insurance will not cover it. I may not have been a math major, but I can see the insurance companies are the ones getting swindled. Until unnecessary (and costly) procedures are put in check, our healthcare spending (and deficit) will continue to climb.
Complete disconnect between respect for unborn baby in a "wanted" birth and one who is "unwanted". This Arizona mom was *threatened* with a court-ordered cesarean, if she did not willingly go under the knife. HUH??!!! In these situations, the logic holds that mom is not doing what's best for baby (i.e. forgoing an unnecessary cesarean for a vaginal birth), so a court needs to intervene and do what is best for baby (i.e. cut him out). Clearly, this mom does not know what she is doing and is incapable of making prudent decisions for her children. The hospital must step up to cut baby out so he/she is "safe" and alive. Why oh why, then, are women allowed to walk into Planned Parenthood clinics (at the same gestational age as Joy's expected baby) and procure abortions?! Why is Joy's baby "protected" by a court system, but the baby in Planned Parenthood is not? Simply because Joy wants her baby and another does not? Wanting to care for your newborn is not what gives value to his/her life. A baby's life is inherently valuable, regardless of his race, size, age, ability and others' feelings towards him. A baby's life is valuable because he is human and because he exists. U.S. healthcare (and our society in general) will continue to be in an abysmal state unless we start recognizing the immeasurable value of human life and respecting it across the spectrum.

After being bothered by the previous article, I then came across this wonderful post by Dr. Christiane Northrup (posted by a friend on Facebook, thanks Beth!). It was a much needed read from another woman of a like-mind. Moreover, she is an OB/GYN who actually respects the process of birth! We are in desperate need of more physicians like her. We are also in desperate need to hear her message over and over again . . . TRUST YOUR BODIES, ladies. Trust your babies. Trust birth.

'Tis the season . . .

2009-10-08T00:22:00.004-05:00

Well, since we have hit the month of October, it is that time again . . . yep, you guessed it! Breast Cancer Awareness and everywhere you go will be donned in pink. (See, I am even using pink to honor the occasion.)

What you will not see mentioned in the Pepto-Bismal displays around town are the connection between abortion and an increased risk of developing breast cancer. You will also not hear about use of oral contraceptives and increased risk of breast cancer. Why bother educating women on steps they can take to reduce their risk and PREVENT cancer in the first place when it is much more profitable to treat the disease after it has developed? (Sorry, I am turning into a bigger cynic with each passing year!)

Visit here for a good read on how the Susan G. Komen foundation (Breast Cancer fundraisers extraordinaire) still funds abortions via their donations to Planned Parenthood. The very same women Planned Parenthood will "serve" could be back at the Komen door years down the road, maybe helping to raise more money for Komen who can then donate more money to Planned Parenthood . . . does anyone else see the insane circular logic here?!

Please don't mistake my post. I think raising money for research on how to treat diseases is a good thing. But I also think education on prevention of diseases needs to occur first. Why are people so afraid to disseminate factual information and let women make decisions about their "health care" with true and full informed consent?!

This website has more info, as well as some videos from women who suffered from breast cancer after having abortions and using contraceptives themselves. Be sure to scroll down and read the press release of women who have successfully sued their abortionists for not disclosing breast cancer risks.

Yes, there are lots of factors that can contribute to the development of breast cancer. That is true to anything in life. Smokers have an increased risk of lung cancer. Thus, I choose not to smoke in an effort to reduce my risk. Women cannot make that same choice in regards to breast cancer if they are *never* informed of them in the first place during their pregnancy termination visit.

Aarrrgghhh. At least Kellyn will enjoy this month coated in pink. ;)

Chicago politics

2009-09-21T23:05:00.001-05:00

This guy's got my vote . . .

H/T John Bambenek

Reflections on mortality

2009-09-16T16:34:00.003-05:00

I'm going in for surgery tomorrow morning, a procedure to remove these damned polyps from my sinuses that make smelling and nasal breathing an elusive luxury. I've had the procedure done twice in the past, once 12 years ago and another round 10 years ago. They came back with a vengeance last November, and they need to come out.

The build up has almost been unbearable; I've been thinking about it non-stop and I'm surprised to find myself pretty anxious about the whole thing.

Now, here's the set-up: I'll go in, go under general anesthesia, they'll root around in my nose, pulling out all the polyps and other obstructions, I'll come out groggy, and then go home to recover for a week or so. No big deal, right?

Well, what has me worried are the potential risks . . . the sinuses that they'll be working are located pretty durn close to my brain and eyes, so in addition to the risk involved with anesthesia, there's also a chance of brain damage, blindness, even death.

Now, the odds of any of these happening are very remote, and I think there's a 99.999% chance that everything will go smoothly . . . but it's that .001% that has me thinking.

I've certainly not thought much about death in my 30 years up until about a week ago.

(OK, I've decided to not write anymore as this is just going to freak me out even more. In conclusion, please pray for my surgery and the recovery. And if I pass (God forbid), I don't want to hear "On Eagle's Wings" at my funeral!!! Shan, call Nick Haggin and tell him I want the Gregorian chant propers for the Mass.)

UPDATE (Post-Surgery): OK, I'm fine. Let's forget this post ever happened. I'll reflect on death some other time.

Department of Motor Vehicles

2009-09-01T20:45:00.002-05:00

"You mustn't f--- with the Department of Motor Vehicles. We can make your life a living hell."--License to Drive

An apt quote from a fun 80's movie. (I fell in love with Heather Graham when I first saw it.) Every single time I walk into the DMV, I get that sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. I don't think I've ever escaped unscathed from there.

I went in last Friday to renew the sticker for the Prizm and I had high hopes as I walked in, as there was nary a person in the "renewal" line. I walked right up and started the process, holding my breath and hoping that it would be over as quickly as possible. I gave my license plate info, she found it and asked for a check for $86 (hey, wasn't it like $78 last year?!?). Right on the counter in front of me was a sign that said (and this is verbatim, mind you):

"Make checks payable to:
Secretary of State
Dept. of Revenue"

Easy enough. I wrote the check as the employee was going to get a receipt. But then she returned and said, "I can't take that check; you need to make it out to the "Secretary of State" only."

Now of course, my wife handed me a single check as I walked out the door, so I sort of just stared in disbelief for a second. After I regained my wits, I said to her (with an admittedly annoyed tone), "Well, you may want to change this little sign here . . . " and then she retorted before I could finish with, "No, I shoudn't change the sign, as some people need to make a check out to the Dept. of Revenue." (Her response was even more caustic than my own.)

Luckily (and this is not something you can take for granted at the DMV), they took Visa . . . for a 2.5% fee. Seriously, who charges a stinkin' fee for using credit anymore? I charged the increased amount, grabbed my sticker and fled before my soul was damaged any further.

I sure wish a trip like this was the exception, but this actually was one of the more pleasant experiences I've had in that Purgatory. Why must it be like this? Though this post could take a number of directions at this point, let me just try to use the DMV as an example of how the government shouldn't run anything.

--Have you ever noticed that you walk in the door of the DMV and stand in one large line while 3-5 other tellers aren't doing anything? The large line is to tell you where you need to stand in line next . . . thanks. Could we not have 2-4 "info" lines and put some of the human capital that's already there to work? Apparently when you're trained to work at the DMV, you learn one particular skill and that's it. And so if no one comes in for 2 hours needing a sticker renewal (which probably happens a lot at the beginning of the month), you don't do anything, especially not help the overworked info line person.

--Of course, a government agency like this can afford to be wasteful with people's time and their own employees as they aren't directed by profits or losses, as the free market is. They use tax money, which is a lot like Monopoly money for many govt. agencies.

--What would happen if a private business was opened up to compete with the DMV? The DMV would be empty. A savvy entrepreneur would make the experience so much better for the consumer by doing one or all of the following:

1) Making a more attractive atmosphere

2) Shortening the average time a consumer has to spend in the DMV

3) Making the on-line and/or snail mail renewal less of a hassle

4) Hiring fewer and/or more efficient, and friendlier employees (gosh, why do they always act like you're less than a person?)

5) Along with number 4, creating a better work environment for their employees so they aren't always such sour-pusses, and employee turnover is low (so as not to waste resources by having to constantly hire and train new people)

6) Make better use of electronic resources (once, I had to watch while they filled out a paper form for a transfer of title . . . why not either have me fill it out myself while I'm waiting in line or type it into a stinkin' computer so the info is always there!) and making payment easier (they'll take checks for some things, but not other things . . . and they'll take cash for some things, but not other things . . . and they charge a fee for credit card transactions!)

7) Hire someone that speaks Spanish!

--But of course, the government would never allow this . . . they know that they couldn't match up to the competition.

The Truth Hurts . . .

2009-08-18T23:51:00.005-05:00

It's the day every mother fears.

She knows it's coming and she can't escape it.

She holds her breath . . . thinking maybe if she quietly slips through her days, no one will notice.

But in her trembling heart, she knows the truth . . . and boy, oh boy, does it hurt!

Her size has expanded. No more are her younger, cuter days of "perfect" jeans and little hips. Gone are the times of a carefree waistline and a rounded bottom. She is starting to sag in areas that used to perk. She is starting to increase in areas that used to fit in tight squeezes (crowded and unsafe piling into the backseat of teenage-driven cars, anyone???). Her body has changed, and her children are there to confirm those changes.

An interaction occurring a few nights ago while I was finishing laundry:

(Shannon folding her underoos and quietly minding her mama-business.)

Kellyn: Are those yours, Mama?

Me: Yes, honey . . .

Kellyn: WHOA! Those are BIIIIGGG underwear!
(With an appropriate astonished look on her face to boot)

**Ouch.** Sadly, I vividly remember having those same exact thoughts about my own mother's underwear. Life certainly has a way of keeping us humble, heh? ;)

Summer Cuts

2009-08-13T19:24:00.012-05:00

About a year ago, I began cutting Heath's hair to save some money. (Don't worry, I went through an actual step-by-step with a beauty school drop-out . . .that sounds bad, but she is wonderful! Thanks Shelly!) I buzz the back and scissor cut the top, which is time-consuming when you are a perfectionist who agonizes over almost every single cut you make. Well, since it is summer (and finally starting to warm up this year), Heath agreed to let me buzz the whole thing as a time-saver. I decided to do the same with Cavan as he was in DIRE need of a cut as well. Here are the before and afters:

Hairy Daddy

Clean cut and respectable

Shaggy Cavan

My big boy ;)

The handsome men in my life (minus Sebastian)!

Remnants of the process
Overall, I think I like them both with a little more hair on their head, but this might be a nice option for future summers. ;)

Cash for Clunkers

2009-08-13T14:08:00.001-05:00

Courtesy of my pal, Shawn.

Cash for Clunkers

I have a modest proposal for getting rid of wasteful spending, irresponsible government and even out-of-sight deficits: let's demand cash for trading in congressional clunkers. The idea occurred to me when I recently found out that our esteemed House of Representatives just authorized $200 million for three new luxury jets to take them on the "necessary" trips that they have to go on in order to do the business of government that we have not asked them to do. Since "we the people" are their bosses, we technically "own" their services, and therefore, if we just told them that their services were no longer needed and traded them in for cash, we may finally be able to get some value out of them or get new ones that actually function properly. It works for deadbeat and inefficient cars, why not for congressmen - and congresswomen of course?

Read the whole thing

Public Domain Children's Books

2009-08-13T14:05:00.000-05:00

This looks like a nice resource:

http://en.childrenslibrary.org/

The Case Against Facebook

2009-08-09T21:00:00.004-05:00

Since I've been receiving pressure from all sides to join up in the latest ephemeral on-line fad, I thought a nice old-fashioned refutation would be in order.

My laundry-list of reasons why I haven't joined the "Cool Kids" club yet:

1) Time waster: Between work, family, books, hobbies, and the plethora of other internet time-sucks I take advantage of (e-mail, blogs, etc.), how can I justify wasting more of my day on Facebook?

2) Popularity Contest: It's basically all the things I hated about high school, right? Having as many "friends" as possible, hoping not to be excluded from somebody's group of "friends", writing on people's walls, doing anything possible to be unproductive with your time . . . yeah, I remember this: Trico High School '95-'98.

3) Lack of Profundity/Impermanence: The thing I love about blogs is that I can post something of substance or something family-related and know that someday my children may be interested to peruse the archives. I doubt any of my progeny will be interested to read my status updates such as, "Oh man, does my toe ever hurt today!"

4) Risk of Offending: I have my high school buddies, my college drinking pals, my Jesus friends, my students, etc . . . it's best if each group knows as little about my other relationships as possible. Would I have to sweat out each update, hoping someone wouldn't take offense about over "I think Miller Lite sucks" or "Have you accepted Jesus Christ into your heart as your personal Lord and Savior"? (OK, you wouldn't see the latter . . . maybe the former.)

5) "Culture of Non-relation": One of the priests at Newman coined this phrase about the current generation. An Archbishop recently warned about the "dehumanizing" effects of social networking sites such as Facebook:

“We're losing social skills, the human interaction skills, how to read a person's mood, to read their body language, how to be patient until the moment is right to make or press a point,” he said. “Too much exclusive use of electronic information dehumanizes what is a very, very important part of community life and living together.” (Link)

A compelling case, I know . . . now, with all that being said: I'm in. I'm going to sign up right now. Sounds like fun.

UPDATE: OK, I started signing up and gave Facebook the following preliminary info: Name, e-mail address, DOB, sex. That's it. The next page came up with a list of about 30 people, all of which I know from various associations. WTH?!? What kind of "1984" set-up is this?!?

"Latinized" hymns

2009-08-07T12:54:00.002-05:00

Two of my loves have come together: Latin and hymnody. This gent has taken a ton of hymns in English, translated them into Latin, and put them into a poetic, singable meter.

He clearly has way too much time on his hands.

http://www.latinisedhymns.org.uk/

You know the hippie quotient is getting a little high when . . .

2009-08-06T00:46:00.002-05:00

. . . your 3-year old daughter approaches you asking to have hummus for dinner.

(Sigh)

Accepting Help

2009-08-05T23:35:00.002-05:00

For those of you who know me well, you know I have a very difficult time accepting help (although I am MUCH better than I used to be!) and an even harder time, asking for help. I think much of this is due to my family of origin and how I grew up. As an adult child of an alcoholic, I am accustomed to getting my needs met by myself. This was a helpful behavior as a child because often, I had to take care of myself (and sometimes, younger siblings). However, now that I am a mom of 3 precious babes, this behavior does not serve me so well anymore. In fact, it is frequently harmful, unproductive and downright ridiculous at times. (Imagine a woman w/ baby in sling, one child at each hand, carrying 3 bags over her shoulder, balancing a basket on her head and attempting to push a cart across the lot with her abdomen or hips . . . that exact scenario hasn't happened yet, but it's a possibility!)

All of this is a prelude to a simple story about me accepting help. I know, I know, less talk, more content. ;) This past weekend, I made a shopping trek out to Meijer with Sebastian and Kellyn in tow. I go through the self-checkout there b/c we use our own re-usable bags and that's not easy for a cashier to do when all the service lines are already equipped with the circular, 4 rows of bags, spinny thing that they use. As I began scanning items, a woman approached me and asked if I needed help. I looked around with uncertainty. She was not a Meijer employee and I found it odd that she would just volunteer to help me. I said, "Sure" somewhat cautiously. Then, I spent the entire time at the checkout mentally exploring possibilities of why in the world she would want to help me. Was it a dare? Would she ask for money when she was done? Did I look that pitiful for a random stranger to offer help?!

She filled up my bags with our groceries and stocked them into a new cart. We then proceeded to the van in the parking lot with both carts (Kellyn was still sitting in the one I was pushing). She mentioned something about working in the nail salon there and noticing me with the baby and all those groceries. Since there weren't any customers, she excused herself (with supervisor's permission) and came to help me. What a very sweet, random act of kindness!

I am so thankful for that interaction for a few reasons: 1) It demonstrates that we are still a society that can care enough about one another to reach out and help 2) My acceptance of help is proof to me that I am indeed recovering from hard-to-break dysfunctional habits (Recovery is a life-long process after all!) 3) It was as if God wrapped up this tiny little gift and bestowed it at a time when I truly did need a little help (and here I was thinking of all the negative reasons she was trying to help me!). Learning new habits is challenging, but I am hoping "yes, you can help me" will leave my mouth a little easier.

The one drawback to not packing your own groceries: broken eggs and smooshed bread. No matter. My wonderful husband suggested salvaging the eggs and making omelettes! Where would I be without him?!

Swine Flu Fear-Mongering

2009-08-04T15:27:00.002-05:00

I've been receiving lots of email updates recently about the current development of a swine flu vaccine. True to form, following the recent outbreaks in Mexico and U.S., fear blindly sweeps through our nation. I will admit, I am also fearful of the unknown and illnesses that can have very negative outcomes for certain populations. However, I don't think "fast-tracking" vaccines into development without proper testing is the answer.

Below are two snippets from 60 minutes in regards to the 1976 Swine Flu Scare and subsequent government vaccination program. I love Mike Wallace. ;) He asks the simplest of questions that sometimes are too hard for people to answer. Why? Because unfortunately, the truth is harder than fiction.

Like I talk about ad-nauseum in the Bradley Method classes I teach, informed consent involves knowledge of the benefits, risks, what the procedure is, and what alternatives are available. Then, only after people have all of that factual information (which is more than just one side's propaganda), can they make a truly informed decision and consent to medical procedures. Informed consent is more than just signing a page long document filled with fine print. Whatever you choose to do regarding vaccines, please be sure you are informed.

Here is more from Barbara Loe Fisher at the National Vaccine Information Center (NVIC) in regards to the incidence of the flu and other important statistics:

Lastly, here are Dr. Mayer Eisenstein's recommendations for maintaining health. While we are still in summer, flu season is right around the corner. Here's hoping for a healthy one for you and your families!

The Benefits of Sunshine

2009-07-31T18:00:00.004-05:00

Heath and I have regular "educational" moments with our children concerning their health and lifestyle choices that we are making. While we by no means are the model of health, we are working on improving our choices so we can be healthier as a family and provide good models to our children. Hopefully, this will aid them in making overall healthier choices throughout their lives.

Cavan and Kellyn have attended a camp called "Eco-Adventures" this summer, which meets once a week in the mornings. A couple of weeks ago, the topic covered was reptiles and amphibians. The youngsters went out for a hike, looking for frogs and turtles when they stumbled upon one turtle sun-bathing on a big log in the lake. Here is the interaction that took place:

Savannah (camp leader): Why do you think that turtle is out in the sun?
Cavan: He's getting his vitamin D!

Times like those make me smile. ;)

What is our country coming to . . .

2009-07-27T12:02:00.002-05:00

. . . when a Congresswoman compares the surgical procedure of an abortion to the surgical procedure of a tonsillectomy?

Regardless of where you stand on the issue, I would hope one can see that this is not anywhere near an adequate analogy.

Lord, have mercy on us. Mary, Mother of God, pray for us.

Medical care confusion

2009-07-25T09:13:00.001-05:00

"Is there a coherent argument for government-controlled medical care or are slogans and hysteria considered sufficient?"

A fine lead-in to a fine article by my favorite economist, Thomas Sowell.

Link

Obsolescence

2009-07-24T16:27:00.002-05:00

Fun article about stuff that our kids will probably never encounter:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/magazine/8117619.stm

A few of my favorites:

Inserting a VHS tape into a VCR to watch a movie or to record something.

I still do this. What's DVR?

6. Rotary dial televisions with no remote control. You know, the ones where the kids were the remote control.

Up until a few years ago, Shan and I were still using the TV I got for a birthday present when I was about 11. Sometimes it would lose focus and you had to bump the knob to get the picture back.

17. That there was a time before ‘reality TV.’

When is this going to go away? I'm even more jaded after the Jon and Kate drama . . .

19. The scream of a modem connecting.

Do you remember that awful, awful noise that modems made? As a nun once said, "it sounds like the moaning of the Damned in Hell!"

30. Blowing the dust out of a NES cartridge in the hopes that it’ll load this time.

I don't know how many hours of my life were wasted loading, removing, blowing, inserting, loading . . .

37. Finding out information from an encyclopedia.

I still remember when my parents took me to an auction (I was about 8 or so) so we could bid on an old, old set of Encyclopedias. They still have them; I think they date from the 50s.

Think about this now; you can go to wikipedia.org and find info on nearly any obscure item you can think of in about 10 seconds . . . and it's always right.

63. Rotary-dial telephones.

Yep, we had one of these when I was a kid.

66. Pay phones.

Heck, these are almost all gone already. Last summer, I was in Chicago at a conference and I searched the whole campus for a payphone so I could call my family. None to be found anywhere. And no, it still didn't make me pine for a cell phone.

77. Relying on the 5-minute sport segment on the nightly news for baseball highlights.

How life-changing was cable and the ubiquity of ESPN? Now, you can watch sports all day and night on multiple channels if you so choose.

86. Finding books in a card catalog at the library.

Wow, what a time suck that was. Think of all the time librarians spent putting cards in for the author, title, subject . . . all for one book!

87. Swimming pools with diving boards.

I don't understand this one . . . why would they go away?

97. Spending your entire allowance at the arcade in the mall.

Mortal Kombat, anyone?

The National Debt Clock

2009-07-17T20:17:00.001-05:00

Yikes.

The wife and kids are gone . . .

2009-07-17T20:10:00.002-05:00

. . . and boy, is it quiet around here! Shan and the little ones are seeing my folks right now and I stayed behind, with weekend Masses and a wedding to tend to.

These trips-without-Dad are always bittersweet for Dad himself. I love that my parents are enjoying my children (and vice versa), that my wife is getting some "time off", that I can do whatever I feel like doing (like watch a complete season of a show on DVD in about 48 hours : ) . . . but I sure miss them by about Day 3. Not there yet, but talk to me on Sunday!

Lightning Bugs

2009-06-27T21:31:00.003-05:00

Is there any doubt that God created lightning bugs with children in mind? They are easy to catch, they don't bite, they don't fly away immediately . . . and they light up, for Pete' sake! What fun for kids and parents!

I love summertime.

(Also, Cavan, who is sitting in my lap as I write this, wanted me to write the following)

Cavan loves Daddy and Mommy!

Great homeschooling diatribe

2009-06-22T12:20:00.002-05:00

From a blog post here:

. . . . "That last comment jumped off the page at me: "Teenagers can't grow up if their main contacts are with other 17-year-olds." And yet isn't it an intrinsic, readily-accepted "fact" that putting kids of the same age together in groups of 15, 20, or 30 day in and day out for nine months out of the year is somehow an essential, "traditional" part of "growing up"? If children grow up by modeling older people, then why is it so readily assumed that complsory public education is necessary for the "socialization" of children?

"It used to be, Bauerlein notes, that children would spend some 5, 6, or 7 hours a day with their peers, and then would move back into the world of their parents, coming in touch, even if indirectly, with the "real world." Yet something about this doesn't add up. Part of it is that the compartmentalized lives of so many children is merely a reflection of what the "real world" is and how it operates. And while it's easy enough to blame technology, it seems to me that technology only drives the car, so to speak, when those who should be driving the car don't know why they are in the car, or where the car is going.

"Put simply: kids spend 12 or 13 years in a public school system that not only bears no resemblance to reality, but is often an active enemy of reality by virtue of the many artificial social barriers created and maintained in the name of "education." Children are told repeatedly that education is necessary and valuable because it will help them get a good job, have a stable and exciting career, and provide them with comfort and security. They are not encouraged to think about the meaning of life, the mystery of existence, the pursuit of truth, the joy and necessity of pursuing the good. Within this sterile and shallow world (which I dwelt in for 13 years, K-12), there is occasional relief from boredom and restlessness, but for the most part kids just try to survive. An essential part of that survival is, of course, having friends, fitting in with a certain group, finding some sort of identity.

"This is even more the case, of course, when kids come from broken families and when their contact with adults is often uneven, uncertain, non-existent, or even abusive. As they shuttle from this home (with mom and boyfriend) and that home (dad and stepmother) and another house (grandparents or family friends), they innately seek to create some sort of stability, however tenuous or empty it might be. Having constant contact with friends via any number of devices is partially a result of thinking (and being taught, at least indirectly) the adult world is of no interest or value to them, and a matter of belonging, however superficial that belonging might be. Kids raised in homes with few books, little meaningful conversation, and constant television (and other forms of entertainment) will tend to think and relate in scattered and convenient ways, all of which promise instant satisfaction and immediate results.

"In other words, while technologies can certainly deepen the problem, the central issues are, as always, a matter of first questions: Who am I? What am I? Why am I alive? What is the meaning of existence? What is the good? Having rarely, if ever, consider these questions—and rarely if ever having been asked these questions—kids and adults alike will naturally gravitate to what is base, easy, convenient, pleasurable, entertaining, and comfortable."

Source

Catholic Confusion

2009-05-30T02:49:00.002-05:00

As I mentioned earlier, we are trying (some days struggling) to get into the habit of a family rosary at night (an abridged version due to the young ages of our children). One thing that has impressed me is how many of the mysteries Cavan does retain, and Kellyn too if she can see a picture. Heck, I didn't even know all of them until college and every now and then, I still have to stop and think about the order of some in the Sorrowful and Luminous vein!

Well, a couple of weeks ago, we were meditating on the Sorrowful Mysteries. For those who are not Catholic or those who have forgotten, here is the rundown:
1) Agony in the Garden
2) Scourging at the Pillar
3) Crowning with Thorns
4) Carrying of the Cross
5) Crucifixion

We were on the first mystery, one of my favorites to meditate upon as it highlights so much of the human side of Jesus, as well as complete submission to God's will in the end. When we talk about this mystery with Cavan and Kellyn, we use one picture which shows an angel at the side of Jesus. So, on this particular night:

Me: Kellyn, what happened in the first Sorrowful Mystery?
Kellyn: Ummm (looking down at the necklace in her hand) . . .
Me: Here, sweetie, look at the picture.
Kellyn: Ummm . . . an angel came . . .
Me: Yes . . .
Kellyn: An angel came to Jesus . . . and said "You're going to have a baby!" (with a smile beaming from her face in pride of her accomplishment)

The First Joyful Mystery is the Annunciation when an angel appeared to Mary and announced that she had conceived a child. Ah, so many angels and too little time to remember what happened when . . . .

Reflections on a citation . . .

2009-05-24T17:38:00.003-05:00

. . . a speeding citation that is. On Holy Thursday, as I was driving to work, I got pulled over on University Avenue for doing 40mph in a 30mph zone.

I was going too fast and I got caught . . . the fault lies with me completely and totally. Nevertheless, as I was getting written up, a series of thoughts passed through my mind:

--I'm a bit frustrated with our speeding laws and their enforcement. First off, the phrase "speed limit" seems to indicate that that speed is the absolute highest you can go without being punished. And yet, I've never been pulled over for going 31 in in a 30 zone. Or even 35 . . . they should rename them "speed guidelines" or "speed suggestions."

And so from a officer's perspective, they must have an arbitrary number in their head at which they'll pull you over. For example, in a 30mph zone, maybe an officer won't pull you over unless you're going at least 38. But another officer may let you go 41 before he pulls you over. The trouble with this is that drivers aren't really sure how fast they can go before being punished.

--Another problem is the enormous waste of time the whole process necessitates. It seems that the average speeding stop lasts at least 20 minutes. It takes so durn long to write the actual citation . . . man, think of the loss to the economy of all the countless hours wasted while waiting to be "rung up."

--The inconsistency on the part of our law enforcement can be a problem as well. For instance, there must be a ton of factors an officer takes into account when he is discerning whether or not to pull someone over. "Is this person going over my arbitrary speed "limit"?" "Do I really feel like hassling with this person and writing up another stinkin' citation today?" "I'm off in ten minutes . . . do I want to work an extra 15 minutes to ticket this guy?" "If I do pull him over, will I write him a ticket or just a warning?" "Have I met my quota for the month?" (NB I had always heard that you're more likely to get a ticket at the end of the month when an officer needs to make his "quota" . . . does anyone know if there is any validity to this? I really don't know . . . )

In other words, officers are making some disciplinary mistakes that I could never endorse if this was a parent/child situation (officers as parents/disciplinarians, drivers as children/disciplinees(?)): 1) Not making the boundaries clear (arbitrary speed limits) and 2) Not giving consistent discipline when that boundary has been crossed. It makes for a very frustrating situation for all parties.

Solutions . . . hmm. In the ideal world (one in which I am the supreme head of all things), the following would happen:

--Make actual speed limits and enforce them. Bump all of them up a bit and then make it clear that this is a real limit . . . if you go even one mile over the limit, you will be cited (no warnings either: you break the law, you pay).

--Shorten the amount of time for a traffic stop. A few things could be changed: 1) Speeding laws are enforced with technology (radars, cameras, tickets automatically mailed to your home) or, if the human element is necessary, 2) Have something in place that can transmit electronically most of the information needed on the ticket (e.g. a button could be pushed that would use a GPS system to register the time, the location, date, etc. so the officer wouldn't have to write it). A stop shouldn't take more than five minutes, in my book.

Also, could we just pay the ticket right then and there with a credit card? : )

A final anecdote: As I was preparing to pay this last ticket, I made a phone call to the city to see if I could take one of those Driver Safety classes and get the ticket expunged from my record. I had done this back when we lived in Chicago, and though I had to pay a bit extra and spend a Saturday morning sitting through the excruciating class, the ticket was left off my record and didn't affect my insurance premium. Anyway, the person informed me that as long as it had been at least four years since I had taken the class, I could take it again.

I dug up my old workbook that still had my certificate in it . . . and it turns out that I had finished the class in May 2005.

I got this last ticket in April 2009. 3 years and 11 months later.

Crap.

(Update: I would hate for the above to be construed as I'm unjustly criticizing our law enforcement. I'm actually very appreciative for the feeling of safety my family and I have due to the presence of the police in our city/state/country. This post was only to point out an area that a fresh perspective could provide some food for thought. And I'm quick to add that I've never actually talked about any of the above with an actual officer of the law, who is sure to have more insight into the matter than myself.)

DebtDebtDebtDebtDebtDebt . . .

2009-05-23T14:34:00.003-05:00

Sorry kids, Daddy will be dead/retired when you have to pay all this back . . .

Tx to Jimmy Akin

Fun sites

2009-05-23T14:21:00.002-05:00

Two new sites I came across recently through colleagues, which have been a lot of fun for the kids and I:

1) www.tarheelreader.org

A site designed, I believe, for older students who struggle with reading at an elementary level, it's been used quite a bit for young beginners as well. You can search for photos, put a caption for each, and make your own story. Cavan's been doing a nice job reading quite a few all by himself, and it's a great way to learn new vocabulary, as he is good to ask us when he doesn't know a word.

Also, we've been using quite a few from the "Latin" section. He's gaining quite a bit of Latin vocab from some of the easier ones (with me reading and helping to translate, of course), such as this one:

http://tarheelreader.org/2009/05/21/de-bestiis-variis/

2) www.makebeliefscomix.org (carefully note the spelling)

You can make your own simple comic strips! You only have a few images to choose from, but you can give characters their own talk bubble and type in anything. It's been a lot of fun for Cavan, as he is getting better at manipulating the images and exploring the different options. He dictates and I type for him, which fosters a bit of creativity on his part. This is our finest collaboration, thus far:

http://www.makebeliefscomix.com/Comix/?comix_id=2853434C108202

Pray for Your Persecutors

2009-05-21T01:53:00.002-05:00

Thanks to a local Catholic homeschooling group, we are getting into the habit of saying a family rosary every night. This is an abridged version (1 Our Father, 1 Hail Mary and 1 Glory Be) as our kids are not-quite 5 years, 3 years and 2 months old. So, we take what we can get and hope they are soaking up some of the faith in our imperfect execution. ;)

Before the rosary, we always go around and individual family members have the option of offering up intentions or stating whom they would like to pray for that evening. Sometimes the children have adorable offerings, sometimes they have none and sometimes they are interesting. A couple of weeks ago, Cavan was praying for different family members and Kellyn was having a fiery attitude (as is often the case when she doesn't nap . . . why don't I enforce those more regularly???).

Cavan: I'd like to pray for . . . um . . . Sebastian . . .
Kellyn: (with a slight wine) Noooo . . .
Me: He can pray for Sebastian if he wants to. Go ahead, Cavan.
Cavan: Um . . . and Tewyn (i.e. Kellyn) . . .
Kellyn: (with the shrillest scream) NOOOO!!!! NOOO!!! NOOO!!
Me: Kellyn, calm down, he was just praying for you.
Kellyn: (with furrowed eyebrows and a gruff, mean face to her older brother) Next time, you-- don't--PWAY FOR ME!!!

Ah, the lessons of Jesus within family prayer time . . .

Parenting Wisdom by Cavan Isaiah

2009-05-12T00:37:00.002-05:00

I am continually amazed by the number of questions and comments our Cavan (who was a late talker) throws at me in one day. Last week, while I was nursing Sebastian and he was looking a bit pensive on the couch, he stated:

Cavan: Mom...
Me: Yes, Cav?
Cavan: Mamas put der (their) babies in swings (he means "slings") and the babies det happy and the babies doh (go) to sweep (sleep).

Just shy of 5 years old, this kid has already figured out one of the oldest parenting tricks in the book! Yay for babywearing. ;)

Homeschooling/socialization

2009-05-06T20:53:00.001-05:00

Interesting, yet not surprising, at least in my eyes . . .

Homeschooling and Socialization

"What about the socialization?" One occasionally hears this question with regard to homeschooling.

Here's a quote from psychology professor Richard G. Medlin's article, "Home Schooling and the Question of Socialization," Peabody Journal of Education, Vol. 75 (2000): 107-23.

Shyers (1992a, 1992b), in the most thorough study of home-schooled children's social behavior to date, tested 70 children who had been entirely home-schooled and 70 children who had always attended traditional schools. The two groups were matched in age (all were 8-10 years old), race, gender, family size, socioeconomic status, and number and frequency of extracurricular activities. Shyers measured self-concept and assertiveness and found no significant differences between the two groups.

The most intriguing part of the study, however, involved observing the children as they played and worked together. Small groups of children who all had the same school background were videotaped while playing in a large room equipped with toys such as puzzles, puppets, and dolls. The children were then videotaped again in a structured activity: working in teams putting puzzles together for prizes.

Each child's behavior was rated by two observers who did not know whether the children they were rating were home-schooled or traditionally schooled. The observers used the Direct Observation Form of the Child Behavior Checklist . . . , a checklist of 97 problem behaviors such as argues, brags or boasts, doesn't pay attention long, cries, disturbs other children, isolates self from others, shy or timimd, and shows off. The results were striking -- the mean problem behavior score for children attending conventional schools was more than eight times higher than that of the home-schooled group. Shyers (1992a) described the traditionally schooled children as "aggressive, loud, and competitive" (p. 6). In contrast, the home-schooled children acted in friendly, positive ways.

Link

Girl Talk by Kellyn Margaret

2009-05-06T15:21:00.002-05:00

Some interesting quotes from Kellyn lately. . .

In our parenting, we use the anatomically correct names for body parts. I believe in teaching our children what the parts of their body are actually called. The other day was one time that I maybe wished we had a "code" word. While we were at the library (a very quiet environment), Kellyn says in a not so quiet voice:

"Mom, I have a vagina and you have a vagina 'cuz we're girls, right?"

As I was getting dressed a few days ago, Kellyn was watching me and asked "What's that?" I answered, "A bra." She said, "Oh" and then paused. Next she says:

"When I get bigger and my nursies get bigger, I want a pink bra, okay?"

I don't like that she is already asking for colored undergarments. ;)

And lastly, today she was following Cavan around.

Cavan: Tew (Kell), why are you fowowing (following) me?
Kellyn: Because I wuv you.

It's moments like those that I cherish. ;) I pray they remain close as adults.

Can you tell that they're related?

2009-05-06T07:29:00.006-05:00

Cavan on the bottom, Sebastian on the top (why can't I get these stinkin' pictures to lay out the way I want them to?!?). We should try to get Sebastian in a pose that mirrors one of Cavan's at the same age . . . then we could really compare!

Celeb Speaks Out Against Vaccines

2009-04-24T00:58:00.002-05:00

I received this link from another mom and the article covers the question of vaccine safety. Written by Jim Carrey, he voices some basic concerns that Heath and I have about vaccines and the blanket recommendations accompanying them.

I know some of you have already written us off as the "nutty family/friends who shun every mainstream parenting choice", but truth be told, we are not against vaccines just for the sake of being different. We are not skeptical simply because it is the medical society telling us our children should have 36 of them before the age of 3. That is not why we avoid them. (Although 36 shots seems like a lot for one little 3 year old body, right?) No, there are instances when vaccines may be appropriate. However, I also believe the current U. S. system of vaccination is inappropriate, extreme and unsafe for children. Like Carrey pointed out, there are both good and bad to the vaccines. So why does the medical community tout them as 100% beneficial, without the slightest acknowledgment that they could have potential downsides? Doesn't that seem suspect?! There is a pro and con to everything in life, right?

Heath and I do not vaccinate our children because the risks of receiving the shots do not outweigh the benefits for our family. I realize we live in a country that allows us to make this choice without impending threat of diseases that plagued many children generations ago. And I am so very thankful that we CAN make this choice! Overall, the bottom line is no one knows how "safe" vaccines are. People may still be alive who have received vaccines, but we will never know the full physiological havoc they have wreaked on our bodies. And until the CDC, AAP and vaccine makers can show me an unbiased (e.g. not funded by Merck or other pharmaceutical companies), randomized, controlled clinical trial which proves safety without a shadow of a doubt, I will continue to make the choice I feel is safest for my children (which now includes another precious newborn).

Sebastian pics

2009-04-23T23:45:00.003-05:00

Our computer was down for a bit, thus the long silence. A few pics of our new boy . . .

He's so cool!

2009-04-08T08:23:00.002-05:00

Yes, we're still alive, and yes, I'll post some more pictures soon, but had to share this first:

"Our Teen Prez"

Excerpt:

One of the major reasons for the current insanity is that our president is mind-numbingly immature.

That's why my college-aged children love him so much. He's exactly the same age they are. He cares about the same things -- saving the world based on feelings with no regard to reality and no concern about either history or the future. A vision of utopia that most people have realized, by age thirty or so, cannot co-exist with human nature. And mostly, the thrill of the PAR-TAY!

The man cannot be parted from his crackberry, even in the interest of national security. (In other words, screw the rest of us.) Just like a 16 year-old kid, he lectures us about saving the planet while asking for gas money to go to the mall. (Has anyone calculated the carbon footprint of Airforce One since January 20th?) He wants to hang with celebrities -- which is even scarier when you realize that Simon Cowell is his idea of a celebrity. The country is falling down around us, and he's trying to schedule a dinner with Simon Cowell?????????? (If any of his admirers would like to defend that, the combox is all yours.)

... So now, while the country is falling down around us and there are about fifty fires that would be front page news (if we still had front pages) that our (for lack of a better term) representatives should be dropping everything and fixing immediately, he has them trying to fix the BCS.

WHICH IS NOT SOMETHING A GOVERNMENT SHOULD BE DOING EVEN IF IT WEREN'T RIDICULOUS!

What's next, an senate hearing on the NASCAR race-to-the-chase? A congressional oversight committee for the PGA tournament? And what is going to take precedence in the mind of the Juvenile-in-Chief, the North Korean missile crisis or the Final Four?

Democracy (not that it's possible without a free press, so it's effectively gone) is a lovely thing, until the majority of the voters are so clueless, they would trade freedom and security for a chance to have a prez who would be just so darned cool to have a beer with.

Hat tip to the Pertinacious Papist.

Sebastian Edward Morber--Born March 19

2009-03-24T08:17:00.004-05:00

Sebastian Edward came quickly in the wee hours of the night, approximately 3:08 AM on March 19, 2009, after only 2.5 hours of labor. He weighed 8 lb., 5 oz, and was about 20 inches long.

Like all newborns, he sleeps, eats, defecates . . . and that's about it. Mom and baby are both feeling well and the rest of us are transitioning fairly smoothly. Thank you for your continued thoughts and prayers! More to come, of course . . .

Happy St. Patrick's Day, O'bama!!!

2009-03-17T23:56:00.002-05:00

Heath recently sent me this article link, claiming Obama has some Irish heritage. Incredulous as it may sound, it appears to be true. While I am not certain yet if this will be a stain or triumph for my beloved ancestry, I could NOT pass up sharing this music video! I apologize for all the YouTube shares lately, but I enjoyed this one far too much . . . especially the pre-recorded dance moves they have for our President. ;)

Women behind the wheel . . . yikes

2009-03-15T14:55:00.003-05:00

For many years now, my father, brothers, and I have continually complained about females behind the wheel, much to the chagrin of my wife and mother. (It's all in good fun . . . mostly) This video is a wonderful, compelling example of our case. (I love how the problem is resolved!)

ShamWow!

2009-03-08T15:31:00.002-05:00

I don't usually watch much TV, especially on sleepless nights. Mainly because it is usually just filled with infomercials or Suzanne Sommers or Your Baby Can Read ads. (Don't get me started on that program.) However, a month or so back, Heath and I were both up while kiddos were actually staying asleep (praise Jesus!) and we happened upon a ShamWow commercial. I must admit, I was VERY impressed! You know it is awesome marketing when the commercial ends and I thought, "How have I lived my life up until now without a ShamWow?!" That really is saying alot when I don't even have those same thoughts about cell phones! ;)

I came across this today and had to share. It uses parts of the actual ShamWow ad, but the song is great. Hope you get a kick out of it too.

"Tax the rich!"

2009-03-07T06:57:00.004-06:00

From the "Letters to the Editor" section of the News-Gazette, 3-4-08:

I did not vote for Barack Obama and don't agree with him on anything. However, I came across a quote by Dr. Adrian Rogers (a Christian minister and three-term president of the Southern Baptist Convention) that I would like to share with your readers. It speaks for itself.

"You cannot legislate the poor into freedom by legislating the wealthy out of freedom. What one person receives without working for, another person must work for without receiving. The government cannot give to anybody anything that the government does not first take from somebody else.

"When half of the people get the idea that they do not have to work because the other half is going to take care of them, and when the other half gets the idea that it does no good to work because somebody else is going to get what they work for, that, my dear friend, is about the end of any nation. You cannot multiply wealth by dividing it."

Think about it.

MARSHALL LIPSCOMB

Champaign

Source: http://www.news-gazette.com/news/opinions/letters/2009/03/04/new_taxes_on_wealthy_wont_help_others

Pants on fire . . .

2009-03-06T14:33:00.001-06:00

Well, that didn't take long . . .

Obama’s Top Five Broken Promises

By Phil Kerpen
Director of Policy, Americans for Prosperity

Promise #5: Sunlight Before Signing

What he said:

“Too often bills are rushed through Congress and to the president before the public has the opportunity to review them. As president, Obama will not sign any non-emergency bill without giving the American public an opportunity to review and comment on the White House website for five days.” (BarackObama.com campaign Web site)

What he did:

Obama signed the Lily Ledbetter bill, the SCHIP/cigarette tax hike, and the stimulus bill all with far less than a five-day waiting period that he promised–and continues to promise–on his campaign Web site.

Promise #4: Lobbyist Revolving Door

What he said:

“No political appointees in an Obama-Biden administration will be permitted to work on regulations or contracts directly and substantially related to their prior employer for two years. And no political appointee will be able to lobby the executive branch after leaving government service during the remainder of the administration.” (BarackObama.com campaign Web site)

What he did:

Obama appointed Goldman Sachs lobbyists Mark Patterson chief of staff at the Treasury Department, where he directly oversees his former employer, a recipient of $10 billion of taxpayer funds from the TARP. Obama also appointed Raytheon lobbyist William Lynn to be an undersecretary of Defense.

Promise #3: No Tax Hikes on the Poor

What he said first:

“I can make a firm pledge. Under my plan, no family making less than $250,000 a year will see any form of tax increase. Not your income tax, not your payroll tax, not your capital gains taxes, not any of your taxes.” (September 12, 2008, Dover, N.H.)

What he did first:

By signing H.R. 2 into law, Obama happily signed onto the idea that smokers should pay for a $35 billion expansion of the State Children’s Health Insurance Plan (SCHIP). Cigarette taxes are going up 61 cents a pack starting April 1. Obama signed this bill knowing that the majority of smokers in the United States are working poor, and one in four lives below the federal poverty line.

What he said next:

“If your family earns less than $250,000 a year, you will not see your taxes increased a single dime. I repeat: not one single dime.” (February 24th, 2009, Address to a Joint Session of Congress)

What he did next:

Ignored the already-hiked cigarette tax at the time of the statement and then this restated promise was broken just two days later, when the Obama’s budget proposal was released. His new budget raises 45 percent of its revenue from energy taxes that will be paid by everyone who fills a gas tank, pays an electric bill, or buys anything that was grown, shipped, or manufactured.

Promise #2: Pork Barrel Earmark Reform

What he said:

“The system is broken. We can no longer accept a process that doles out earmarks based on a member of Congress’ seniority, rather than the merit of the project. We can no longer accept an earmarks process that has become so complicated to navigate that a municipality or non-profit group has to hire high-priced D.C. lobbyists to do it. And we can no longer accept an earmarks process in which many of the projects being funded fail to address the real needs of our country.”

(Statement on Earmarks, March 10, 2008)

What he is expected to do:

The White House has signaled that it intends to sign the $410 billion Omnibus Appropriations bill, which according to Taxpayers for Common Sense, contains 8,570 earmarks totaling $7.7 billion, including dozens of wasteful pork-barrel projects. These earmarks were awarded based on seniority, not on merit, and were mostly the result of high-priced lobbying, precisely the process that Obama promised to end. When the omnibus reaches his desk later this week or next week, we’ll find out if this is one more broken promise.

Promise #1: Big Government

OK, so this one is more of a statement than a promise, but it’s the biggest whopper of all.

What he said:

“Not because I believe in bigger government — I don’t.” (February 24, 2009, Joint Address to Congress)

What he did:

Obama proposed a budget that is breathtaking in scope, a blueprint for the biggest permanent expansion of government in history right on the heels of a sweeping trillion dollar stimulus plan. The budget lays the foundation for a government takeover of the health care and energy sectors and dramatically increasing spending across the board, other than defense weapons programs. Spending as a percentage of the economy under this budget will reach the historic level of 27.7 percent this year. The deficit as a percent of the economy, at 12.3 percent, is set to be the biggest in the entire history of the country outside of the four peak years of World War II. Anyone who offers such a budget can only fairly be described as a believer in bigger government.

Phil Kerpen is director of policy for Americans for Prosperity.

Source: http://foxforum.blogs.foxnews.com/2009/03/03/kerpen_obama_budget/

Essentials?

2009-03-04T13:39:00.003-06:00

I was reading a Yahoo! article today on the 12 worst etiquette mistakes people make in public. I agreed with much of what the authors were stating and it's nice to see writers who are unafraid to point out "bad habits" of the general public (not that I think it will actually CHANGE those bad habits). However, what struck me most about this article was the section on cell phones, AKA "Mobile Madness".

I can not begin to tell you how many times I have been annoyed by cell phones! Perhaps this is exacerbated by not having one myself. It was a pretty common sense blurb about how other people really don't want to know about your hot date last night or the latest family drama/dysfunction, etc. Completely agree! So, bottom line: save it for a more private atmosphere. What captured my attention the most was the statement "Mobile phones are essential". Ummm . . . not quite sure I would give them the same classification. I would describe them as convenient, handy, or useful but I would not say they are vital to life.

Humans have been living for thousands of years without many of our modern conveniences and while I do agree that cell phones can even be life-saving in the event of an emergency, I would NOT label it as essential. Air, food, water . . . yes, all of those are "essential" and necessary to our physiological functioning. But a cell phone???? I guess I may very well die soon as I am 29 and have never owned one. It may just be a matter of time for me, folks! I can feel life slipping away as I type this . . .

The above is a perfect illustration of how backwards our society has become. While I for one would NOT want to give up my indoor plumbing and ability to refrigerate foods, there are many, many cultures and people around the world who survive without them. Where there is a will, there is a way. I will admit we are very spoiled as Americans and yes, I enjoy many of those luxuries. So I am certainly not going to bash my friends who own cell phones (which I think is pretty much ALL of you! ;) ) for enjoying that modern convenience. I will, however, argue that you could live without them.

I think it's long past the time of getting "back to the basics" in our country. Family, friends, a good home life, community . . . these are the basics and what we all thrive on. I hope it does not take our country going completely down the toilet before the majority realizes this and makes appropriate changes. I hope we can all soon re-focus on what is truly essential in life: air, water, food and most importantly, love.

2009-03-03T23:01:00.002-06:00

Knowing that all our readers will not agree with the Church's proscription towards the use of artificial birth control, I would hope, though, that all our readers would at least raise an eyebrow at the following:

Check-up, Wake-up

By Kristine L. Franklin
Copyright: Envoy Magazine

It’s the subtle stuff that often knocks me for a parental loop. Like when my good, conscientious, Christian family doctor offered birth control pills to my twelve-year-old daughter. I’m not making this up. Jody said I should write about it so other parents would be prepared. We were definitely unprepared.

It was time for Jody’s seventh grade check-up so I made an appointment with my own doctor we’ll call Dr. X. Dr. X is a Christian, someone I trusted to be sensitive with a twelve-year-old. I told Jody that everything would be fine even if it felt a little embarrassing. I explained about my own yearly physical, and that hers wouldn’t be nearly that extensive. It was just a school physical, but because of her age the “growing up” topics would probably come up.

And indeed they did. I went with Jody into the examination room. Doctor X was friendly and kind. When Dr. X asked if Jody had any questions about puberty, she smiled and said, “My mom has already told me everything I need to know.”

“That’s wonderful,” said the doctor and then proceeded to check Jody’s heart, lungs, ears, and throat. When Dr. X asked me to leave the room for a moment I didn’t think twice. I winked at Jody and left, honoring her privacy and modesty.

Not five minutes later the doctor called me back in. One look at Jody and I knew she was distressed. My motherly alarm system kicked in and I felt my heart speed up. Dr. X left the room and I said,

“What’s wrong?”

“The doctor asked me about birth control,” said Jody. “I don’t even know what it is.”

Stunned is an inadequate description. I felt my face turning red with rage. Dr. X returned and I literally bit the inside of my cheek to keep from spewing forth loud invective. I knew I needed the whole story before I did or said anything. When Jody and I got to the car she told me everything.

Here’s the gist. When they were alone the doctor asked Jody if she was drinking or using drugs. Jody said no and the doctor then told Jody in a firm way how important it was to keep drug- and alcohol-free. Then the doctor asked if Jody had a boyfriend. Jody said no. Then the doctor said, “If you ever get a boyfriend, and you’re having sexual relations, I can give you birth control pills.”

Pause a moment and let that sink in.

In the calmest voice I could muster I told Jody, “The doctor was totally out of line to say that to you. It was wrong, it was inappropriate, it embarrassed you and I am so sorry I left you alone.” I then explained very briefly what “birth control” means, to which Jody replied, “How stupid.”

I prayed and fumed. When we got home I phoned the doctor. In a calm, divinely-assisted tone of voice, I asked for the other side of the story. It squared exactly with what Jody had reported. Then I told Dr. X in no uncertain terms that both Jody and I were offended and that what had been said to my daughter violated the physician’s oath to “do no harm.” Dr. X apologized for offending, but told me that it was a routine conversation for girls Jody’s age. “It’s part of a community-wide effort to cut down on teen pregnancy.”

I told Dr. X that offering to prescribe dangerous hormonal drugs to a preadolescent child behind her parent’s back was a horrific practice (I really said “horrific”) and that the message on premarital sex should be as firm as the message against drugs and alcohol. “You passed up a perfect opportunity to help a child remain committed to chastity.” The doctor didn’t say much.

I don’t know if that conversation did any good. That doctor is a product of our culture and I’m just one of those ultra-brainwashed Catholic mothers who naively assumes that her children can and will abstain from sex before marriage. I can only hope that some of my words sunk in.

Jody wanted me to write this down so all Catholic parents would know to be careful. Even a good doctor with good intentions can point your child toward the path of destruction.

Consider yourself forewarned.

Quickie . . .

2009-03-02T21:05:00.001-06:00

I wish it was Spring.

Mounds of Paper

2009-02-18T02:23:00.003-06:00

I am very much into de-cluttering and organizing our house lately. Gee, could that have anything to do with the impending arrival of baby # 3? ;) I was sorting through another pile of papers that had occupied one corner of our computer room and yes, I was able to recycle a good amount. However, I was simply amazed at the sheer amount of paperwork one family accumulates!!! We are doing our part . . . we have many bills that we pay online and we recycle just about every scrap of paper that comes across our home. I am also getting better about "letting go" of things/papers in general, but we still have plenty that we need to hold onto, tucked away in our file cabinet (e.g. taxes, bills, receipts, my ASHA certification, Bradley certification, etc.). I'm not even certain you will be able to read some of these receipts in 7 years anyway . . . let's just hope we are never audited.

Ah and the reminder, at the top of my "to do" list this week = TAXES! I really don't want that hanging over my head after baby is here. I would rather just enjoy baby with leisurely nursing sessions and revel in the newborn stage all over again.

Back to my original point: why do we have all this paper anyway? There is a certain amount needed for proof and verification purposes (whatever happened to the good old handshake and promise?), but I wonder if some of it is a vain attempt on our part to show that our lives have had meaning . . . that we had a purpose . . . that we were loved, appreciated . . . that we were making personal progress in some fashion. Just wondering out loud. All I do know is that I would be a much less stressed person if I could chuck 80% of this into the recycling bin. ;)

St. Valentine's Day

2009-02-16T21:01:00.002-06:00

I told Shan a few years ago that I wanted to stop "observing" this day. She acquiesced and we hardly even acknowledge it when it rolls around every year. A few issues I take with the day:

1) Pried from its Catholic roots. Our culture is great about taking days with Christian significance and completely secularizing them (e.g. Christmas, St. Patrick's Day, etc.). No exception here. St. Valentine was an early Christian martyr (more here), but I'd be surprised if you heard about that at Applebee's last Saturday night.

2) Expensive. I bought a dozen roses for a girlfriend in high school on this day and I'm still paying down the interest.

3) Makes single people feel like crap. This is probably the worst part of the day. I was single for many V Days and they all sucked. Being immersed in the "jock" scene at my high school, I remember feeling this pressure to have a girlfriend at all times (well, more accurately, to "get some"); if you didn't, your manhood was put into question in the post-practice locker room.

This is something that will change with our kids. I've yet to meet a 16-year old with the maturity to have a serious relationship (or to drive, for that matter, but that's a different post) and I think removing that pressure from young people can hardly be anything but beneficial.

Shan and I have our unofficial St. Valentine's Day on October 1st, the day we met, though we usually forget about it . . . I'm going to mark it on the calendar right now.

Homebirth Editorial in Medical Journal

2009-02-15T12:25:00.003-06:00

I realize many of you are probably sick of hearing me talk about homebirth and midwifery, especially in Illinois. However, this is an excellent editorial about the "higher up" medical organizations (i.e. American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists, American Medical Association) and their recent resolution against "home deliveries". I personally don't even agree w/ the term "home deliveries" as women are birthing babies and not delivering any packages, food, etc. but that is a whole 'nother post. ;)

You can read the editorial here. She sums up the issue pretty nicely and I hope more medical professionals who are aghast at the idea of homebirth will take a minute to read it as well.

Shannon

Hilarity

2009-02-12T00:22:00.003-06:00

I laugh every time I read it.

Link

UPDATE: How do I actually put that image on our site? Obviously the text is easily cut and pasted, but I'm not sure how to actually bring the image over . . . anyone know?

Cavan Quotables

2009-02-10T00:12:00.002-06:00

Here's a couple of recent quotables from our oldest:

Loud crash heard in kitchen

Me: What happened?!

Cavan: Mom, your shelf fell off your beach!

One of my splendid Christmas gifts was a rolling island to create more counter and storage space in our kitchen . . . somehow he interpreted the island as "beach". It would be nice if I had my own beach! (Anyone else sick of winter?!) Though I don't know why there would be shelves there, unless it involved a sand bar w/ a cabana Heath serving me drinks. ;)

And this one just happened today on an absolutely GORGEOUS day, leaving me salivating at the mouth even more for spring's arrival . . .

Cavan: Mom, does Dod (God) wiv (live) in va (the) sun?
Me: I don't know . . . He lives in heaven. Do you think heaven is in the sun?
Cavan: Yeah . . . 'tuz ('cause) den (then) He tan (can) woot (look) down on us and watch over us beddew (better).

So precious are the young years!

Paradoxical Logic?

2009-02-07T20:49:00.002-06:00

Every now and then, we receive a health newsletter from our insurance provider, OSF. One arrived on our doorstep in the fall, shortly before "flu season" with a snippet at the bottom of the front page regarding getting flu shots while pregnant. Here is a sampling of the short notice:

If you're going to be pregnant during flu season, the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention recommends that you get a flu shot. Pregnant women are at high risk for serious illness. And the flu can cause life-threatening complications, such as dehydration or bacterial pneumonia.

What's more if you get sick, treating the flu could be risky. That's because the antiviral medicine usually prescribed haven't been tested for safety in pregnant women, according to the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists. (emphasis mine)

Okay, so let me get this straight. Flu shot = proven safe for pregnant women, antiviral medicine = safety unproven. Now, putting aside my own personal issues w/ ACOG, this just makes me scratch my head. When considering the list of ingredients found within the flu vaccine, how can ALL of those be proven safe for mothers and unborn babies??? (BTW, my general rule of thumb is if I can't pronounce it, I don't need it circulating in my body. Despite this rule, I have a very difficult time finding 100% acceptable food products at the store that aren't raw veggies and fruits.) If you are unaware of some of the flu shot contents, here is a funny look at what is being injected into thousands of people each year:

In Marsden Wagner's book "Born in the USA: How a Broken Maternity System Must be Fixed to Put Women and Children First", he mentions two opposing principles to the practice of medicine. One is precautionary: "assumed unsafe until proven safe" and the other is anti-precautionary: "assumed safe until proven unsafe". I would say that in general, American medicine likes to practice with precautionary principles. We are often throwing out the latest research to help us prove our point. However, especially in regards to maternity care in America, we unfortunately tend to fall in the anti-precautionary camp most of the time. Many careproviders think there isn't a problem, simply because they have not had any catastrophic results yet. One prime example of this is the use of Cytotec (generic name: misoprostol) for inducing/augmenting labor in women. Despite being manufactured for use in adults with stomach ulcers (who first thought it would be a good idea to shove this into a woman's birth canal???), many obstetricians use it to stimulate the cervix and uterus. Please keep in mind that the drug "manufacturer was well aware that one possible side effect of the drug was severe uterine contractions, so it stated on a label that it should never be given to pregnant women" (Wagner 75). Ahhh, now it makes sense . . . a drug label says DON'T, so an intelligent medical school graduate says "Why not? Let's give this a shot!" Cytotec has killed moms AND babies and yet, it probably is still being used in some hospitals today. I am glad there are some warnings out there. But I digress, back to the flu shot.

I was pleasantly surprised to see a few published studies evaluating the benefits of giving the flu shot to pregnant women. Here is one. While it appears that infants in the study group (i.e. mothers who received flu shot) had lower rates of influenza, respiratory illness and fever than the control group (i.e. mothers who only received the pneomococcal vaccine), there are some issues. First, there was no comparison group of mothers who did not receive any vaccines at all. So, you're basically evaluating the effectiveness of vaccine 1 versus vaccine 2, not the effectiveness of vaccine versus no-vaccine. Second, in the summary they concluded that the flu vaccine has "substantial benefits" for both mothers and infants. However, I would argue whether or not the range of reducing symptoms by 29-63% really constitutes "substantial benefits," meaning a large degree of benefits. Lastly, I personally would also want to see rates of how many of those moms were exclusively breastfeeding, as breastmilk contains high amounts of immunities for a nursing baby. Would the breastfed babies be healthier overall than formula-fed or supplemented babies? Furthermore, how many of the babies were in day-care (meaning increased exposure to viruses) and how many were at home with mom?

I think there are other variables that contribute to the health of moms and babies, besides whether or not they receive the flu vaccine. It would also be nice to see more of natural ways to boost your immunity during the flu season. A well-balanced diet with limited processed foods, for instance, not only enhances your overall health but will help determine how well your immune system can fight off infection. Reducing stress is another "free" way to help increase your immune system function. Some things our family has been doing is supplements of vitamin C, vitamin D (which I do think has made a difference, at least for Heath and I this year), and probiotics. But you never see these suggestions in the newspaper (or if you do, it is a rarity). Rather, there are posters everywhere reminding us to get our annual flu shot.

Don't get me wrong. I am NOT saying if you eat well, limit stress (is that possible?) and follow a supplement regimen, you will not get sick. But it may reduce your chances. For me, I would much rather take this route than step into a clinic, roll up my sleeve and consent to a shot with (in my opinion) unproven benefits for myself and baby. Here's hoping we can survive the rest of the flu season unharmed!

I've seen better days . . .

2009-02-07T10:07:00.002-06:00

Well, this past Thursday was a bit of a bummer for a number of reasons:

1) I sold my 1995 Dodge Intrepid. We bought a van a couple months ago, and thought it silly to have 3 vehicles for only 2 drivers. Something had to go, and my gray beauty lost the coin flip. It served me well for nearly a decade and I was just a little sentimental about getting rid of her.

I sent an "ad" out to my fellow staff members (one actually bought it) which seemed to be a hit, though by no means did I intend for it to be humorous. Here it is:

_____

With the impending arrival of Morber child number 3, we bought a mini-van over Xmas break. We now have 3 vehicles, but only 2 drivers! I'm looking to find a home for my old Intrepid; if you know of anyone who needs a car and may be interested (including yourselves), please let me know. Otherwise, I'm also looking for suggestions of where we could donate it if it comes to that. Any worthy charities that have this sort of program?

Details of the car below:

1995 Dodge Intrepid
148,000 miles
Blue Book: approx. $1000+
Sale price: $500

Pros:

--Still drives!
--spacious
--hasn't needed much maintenance over the past 20, 000 miles or so

Cons:

--transmission concern; occasionally will struggle to shift and will go to higher RPMs; stopping and putting in park briefly usually fixes the problem (I've taken it in a few times and it never acts up for the mechanic! Again, it's infrequent.)
--passenger side window sometimes doesn't roll back up
--had a mouse in the car for awhile; some of back seat is chewed up (mouse is gone though!)
--heater works about 60 percent of the time; air conditioning about 25 percent
--driver side-view mirror damaged; hit by a foul ball when my dad parked too close to a baseball field

In all honesty, it may go for another 100, 000 miles or it may die tomorrow. We've taken good care of it, changing oil regularly and not driving like a maniac. I don't hesitate to take it anywhere, even on long trips. It's been a good vehicle.

One more caveat: I'm going to swipe the custom CD player I had put in there a few years back. In other words, it will have no option of playing music at that point (I have no idea where the factory deck is).

_____

Who wouldn't jump at the opportunity to get such a deal!

2) Our "waste management" company sucks. We had to call them for the fourth time in 2 months when they picked up the trash from every other house on the street but ours, yet again. I'd finally had enough: I spoke with someone and said that either a) they could refund our money for the two months that we hadn't received service, or b) we would cancel our service with them. She had to talk to her supervisor and would call me the next day. She didn't. Wonderful customer service, huh?

And get this: at this point in our lives, we don't generate a lot of trash (though lots of recycling stuff) and I don't even set out a can every week. We might have been calling them twice as many times!

3) Pages for All Ages, a family-owned bookstore/cafe nearby in Savoy, closed its doors, due to financial problems as a result of the current recession. This was terrible news. We loved that store. It was very similar to a Borders, but with a more "personable" feel, and the fact that it was an independent-owned store made me feel a lot better about putting my dollars into it. It had a nice atmosphere, adequate selection of books, and a great children's area. The newspaper article mentioned that some of their employees had been working there since it opened, over 20 years ago! When would you see such loyalty at a Barnes and Noble?

Damn this recession. I feel like we've been shielded somewhat by it, as I didn't know anyone who had been laid off, and no store/business closings had really affected us. Until now.

Now I'm pro-free market and I understand that the family-owned business model is slowly (or quickly) going extinct. But it still sucks; I'd much rather support a locally-owned restaurant rather than an Applebee's.

And to top it all off, Shan and I still had $25 gift cards for that place that we didn't use. Crud.

4) The Illinois basketball team is in a bit of a funk, and laid an egg against Wisconsin. In the last couple weeks, they've morphed into last year's crappy team and it's starting to get a bit frustrating to watch. (I don't know how many readers we have that are sports fans, but indulge me for just a bit.)

They've definitely exceeded expectations for this year, but having such a great start to the season (they were 15-2 at one point, now 18-5) only gets my hopes up and makes me angry when they don't play up to their potential. They better turn it around pretty quickly or the last half of the Big Ten schedule is going to eat my soul.

Complaining over. Certainly, if these are the most grievous things I can whine about, things are going pretty well. I have a job, a warm house, healthy children, a loving wife . . . I'm blessed beyond belief. And sometimes, having a crappy day like this does help place things in perspective.

Tickets

2009-02-05T08:00:00.002-06:00

A tale to tell:

Last Wednesday, we received a fairly large snowfall. In Champaign, if the snow is high enough, they send out plows to clear the sides of the street on certain "snow routes." We live on one. During the last snowfall, I was reminded on the radio that I needed to move our cars to a side street and I also had a note on my car telling the same. I came home that evening from work and moved them both. No problem.

So fast forward to last Wednesday. Same situation, but I completely forgot to move our vehicles. I come home late on Wednesdays due to rehearsal, and I hopped into my PJs and set down to spend some family time. At one point, Shannon yelled, "They're towing your car!" I immediately hopped up and ran to the front door, and yelled out to the tow truck folks, "Stop! I'm coming!" I ran to the back room, furiously searching for some blue jeans. I threw some shoes on (mind you, without socks in near-zero degree weather) and darted out the front door. I ran down to my Intrepid and luckily, they didn't tow me. I did realize, however, that our Prism had already been towed. I removed the "snow route" ticket from the windshield and started the car. The snow plow was right behind me, waiting for me to move so he could continue on down the street.

I had just cleaned everything (and I mean everything) out of the Intrepid that very day, as I had found a buyer for it, so I had no snow scraper, and the windshield was caked with snow and ice. I tried scraping it off with my (bare) hands, to no avail. Again, the pressure was on due to the snow plow impatiently waiting behind me. So I improvised: I drove around the block in the now-abandoned parking lane, with the car door open and my head hanging out the window (did I mention it was cooooold?).

I parked the car on a side street. I ran back into the house and started calling around to find where in the heck the Prism is. The police gave me the names of five different towing companies that they use; I called them all, and none knew where the car was. After another half-hour of calls, we finally found where it was. Since the parking attendant (aka Spawn of Satan) had also informed me that the Prism had a hold on it due to an expired sticker (honest mistake), Shannon asked the towing place receptionist if we needed to do anything before they would let us get it out. The lady said she didn't think so. Hmm.

I called a friend that evening (it's almost 10:30 by now) and asked him if he could take me to the tow company in the morning. He acquiesced and came by the next morning at 7:30. We drove to the other end of Urbana and wandered around for far too long, trying to find the darn place. When we finally came upon it, I hopped out, only to find that they couldn't release the car. Yep, you guessed it, we had to get a new sticker and then go to the police department and have the hold taken off. That would have been nice to know in advance.

Shan made the necessary calls and trips that afternoon, and then picked me up from work to get the Prism. We paid all the fees and trekked home. Playing it safe, we made sure both cars were parked on the side street. No need to repeat that fiasco.

There's more. I awoke the next morning to find two new tickets on the cars (one on each), for parking the wrong way on the side of the street. For Pete's sake . . . it's not like I parked the wrong way on a one-way street in downtown Chicago. I didn't even know there was a law against this!

Total tally:

First ticket on Prism: $20
Towing fee on Prism: $100
New sticker for Prism: $105
First ticket on Intrepid: $15
Second ticket on Prism: $30
Second ticket on Intrepid: $30

Total: $300

Oh yeah, I can't find the title for the Intrepid, so I have to buy another one before I sell it. Another 65 bucks.

Illinois Midwifery

2009-01-28T14:13:00.002-06:00

As many of you know by now, we are homebirthers. Unfortunately, for far too many mothers in Illinois, homebirth choices are limited. Below is a short clip on the current crisis state of midwifery in Illinois. You can visit Illinois Families for Midwifery for more information on our new upcoming House Bill 226, the Home Birth Safety Act. If you reside in IL, I urge you to look up your own state legislator (both Senator and Representative) and contact them regarding House Bill 226. It has not yet had a formal introduction to either the House or Senate, but the planning is in the works. Please remember that this is NOT your U.S. Senator and Representative, but rather the men and women at the Illinois state level. Even if you think I am crazy for choosing this option, I hope that you would support me in making this choice for my family. Contacting politicians is MUCH easier than you would think . . . a phone call, email or even short letter asking for their support of H.B. 226 would be SOOOOO very helpful to our cause!

Enjoy the clip!

The Womb--a dangerous place to be

2009-01-26T07:40:00.003-06:00

Shan posted that Obama video (see below) to her Facebook account as well as our blog. An old high-school friend said that the same view (recap: BO was a prime case for abortion; abandoned by his father, raised by a frazzled single mother; he wasn't and look what he has become) could be used in the case of Charles Manson. He came from similiar circumstances and look how he turned out.

A couple problems with this line of thinking. One, the Catholic ad was not meant to be syllogistic, using dry reasoning to close the case on the issue of abortion. What is was trying to do was make people stop and think; how has abortion changed the landscape of our nation? Since one-third of my generation hasn't made it out of the womb, I think it's safe to say that the effect on America has been great, no matter which way you lean on the issue.

Two, he seems to imply that abortion can be a positive thing since it has probably weeded out some other Charles Mansons. Maybe, though the Freakonomics theory of "abortion lowers the crime rate" has been refuted. Nonetheless, surely this can't be used as a pro-choice argument? "Susie, I think you should abort your baby; gosh, he may grow up to be a serial killer!" I think it's safe to say that Charles Manson was not pre-destined from above to turn into a nut-job . . . I'd say some familial dysfunction had a role to play in that. Besides, isn't that a pretty good case for adoption? There's plenty of infertile couples who would probably have given their left arms to raise little "Charlie." Heck, he may have grown up in a stable home and became a doctor, lawyer, father, friend.

As a follow-up, the friend in question sent along this link, which contained a question to "stump anti-abortionists":

"If abortion was illegal, what should be done with the women who have illegal abortions?"

Well, let's look at this one from a rational point of view. I'm no logician (is that a word?), but here's a couple syllogisms to get the party started:

Major premise: Murder is the intentional killing of a human person.
Minor premise: Abortion is the intentional killing of a human person.
Conclusion: Abortion is murder.

Obviously, pro-choice folk will disagree with the minor premise, but for our purposes, let's assume it's true.

Major premise: Murder should be punished in our legal system.
Minor premise: Abortion is murder.
Conclusion: Abortion should be punished in our legal system.

Yes, for pro-lifers to be consistent, they must agree that if abortion were illegal, that a woman who procures an abortion should be punished as a murderer. Though that sounds harsh, look at it this way: If a woman gave birth to her child and then took a knife and stabbed it to death, shouldn't she be charged with murder? So what's the difference if it had taken place minutes before, when the baby was still in the birth canal? Location, nothing more.

And so, if abortion was illegal, and a black-market doctor jammed scissors in the child's skull before it was completely out, wouldn't that be a punishable offense? Wouldn't the woman be an accomplice, at the very least?

Our legal system takes into account variables when deciding murder cases: premeditation, psychological state, etc. They could take these things into account for abortion cases as well. So in many cases, I wouldn't think a woman would get "murder in the first degree", but I think manslaughter would apply, no question.

I know this all sounds very cold, but this whole "rights of the mother" argument has been taken too far, resulting in 50 million abortions in the past 35 years. Instead of encouraging young, scared mothers that abortion is the only route to solve their problems, why can't we support these women and offer them help? Why don't Planned Parenthood counselors make a compelling case for adoption? Why can't we save these women from the many possible effects of abortion (regret, grief, depression, suicidal tendencies, sterillity, breast cancer, etc.)? Why aren't they given any hope?

As many of our readers are friends and family, we hold you all dear to our hearts. We truly hope that one or both of us have affected your life positively in some way, either great or small. In all truth, both Shannon and I and very lucky to be alive today. Both of us were born to young, unwed mothers, both struggling to find their way in life. Both were scared, undoubtedly, feeling lost and probably hopeless. I was born in 1979, a year with a very high number of abortions, Shannon in 1980, a year with the most abortions since Roe v. Wade. We were perfect candidates for an early-term abortion.

I saw my birth mother over Christmas break, and she confirmed that she had called an abortion clinic when she first found out . . . lucky for me, she decided to go through with the pregnancy. Lucky for the both of us, both mothers had support at home; no one whispering in their ear that all their troubles could be over for a quick trip to the "women's health" clinic. I was given up for adoption, Shannon was not. Both of us turned out pretty well, if I do say so myself.

In short, we are very blessed to even be here. And we strive to be a blessing for others; it's inconceivable to think that a different choice by either of our mothers and we wouldn't be married. We wouldn't have our wonderful children. And, we like to think, the world would be worse off.

Blago

2009-01-26T07:22:00.002-06:00

SPRINGFIELD, Ill. – Gov. Rod Blagojevich, taking his defense to television rather than his impeachment trial, lashed out at his accusers Monday and revealed he had considered naming Oprah Winfrey to the U.S. Senate.

(snip)

He said that when he was arrested on federal corruption charges, he took solace from thinking of other jailed leaders — Nelson Mandela, the Rev. Martin Luther King Jr. and Gandhi.
(link)

Does he seem mentally imbalanced to anyone else? The balls on this guy! If a case could be made against direct democracy, this is it. We elected him, not once, but twice! Take a bow, Illinois.

Grateful

2009-01-26T01:29:00.002-06:00

I have been stuck in the house for almost two weeks with sick children. It's cold, snowy and not yet near the end of winter. One can get kind of loopy in those circumstances, so I thought I should take a moment to focus on some of the many blessings in my life.

Here are ten things I am grateful for today:

1) A warm home (even if others disagree that 65 degrees is warm!)
2) Food in my belly and to offer my children (even if it is not always the food they want)
3) An extremely loving, compassionate and patient husband (who puts up with far more emotional dysfunction than he probably bargained for!)
4) Life! I am especially thankful in this month of January (my birthday, anniversary of Roe v. Wade) that my mother (young, unwed, didn't have her act together, etc.) chose to continue with the pregnancy and give birth to me (even if my life was not "normal" growing up).
5) The overall health of my family
6) The love in our home (even if we don't always demonstrate it perfectly)
7) My Catholic faith
8) My babies, who are teaching me every day what it means to love, sacrifice and grow
9) The ability to walk and do things for myself
10) Being a woman, respecting all of our life changes and loving that I am different from men

Hope you can all see the blessings in your life as well, even amidst the moments of struggle.

Life: Imagine the Potential

2009-01-22T12:07:00.003-06:00

This is from Catholicvote.com and has a pretty powerful message . . .

It's a short watch, please take the time to look.

Lullabies--the Standard and the Morbid

2009-01-13T21:27:00.002-06:00

As a musician, it should come as no surprise that I've used lullabies throughout my parental tenure to put my wee ones to sleep. Though I've made my way through a few standards ("Hush, Little Baby" (which Kellyn now refers to as "Rockingbird"), Brahms' Lullaby, etc.), I found out very early on that an old song from the 60's had a sweet, soporific effect on my offspring: "Patches" by Dickey Lee.

I came across this song on an old collection of my parents, and I was intrigued by the simplicity of the song . . . but it's hard not to raise an eyebrow at the lyrics:

Down by the river that flows by the coal yards
stand wooden houses with shutters torn down.
There lives a girl everybody calls Patches.
Patches my darling of old Shantytown.

We planned to marry when June brought the summer
I couldn't wait to make Patches my bride
now I don't see how that ever can happen.
My folks say no and my heart breaks inside.

Refrain:
Patches oh what can I do
I swear I'll always love you
but a girl from that place would just bring me disgrace
so my folks won't let me love you.

Each night I cry as I think of that shanty
and pretty Patches there watching the door.
She doesn't know that I can't come to see her
Patches must think that I love her no more.

I hear a neighbor telling my father
he says a girl name of Patches was found
floating face down in that dirty old river
that flows by the coal yards in old Shantytown.

Patches oh what can I do
I swear I'll always love you.
It may not be right but I'll join you tonight.
Patches I'm coming to you.

Yep, the guy offs himself after she goes first . . . how Shakespearean. Anyway, it works like a charm: hardly an eyelid can resist the gravitational pull of this song. I'm just really interested when I'm singing it to a younger sibling and Cavan perks up and says, "Hey, wait a minute . . . "

Here it is. (Musician's note: With its 3(!) key changes, the piece has a range of a minor 13th! Try that with a babe on your chest!)

Prelude to Greatness, Part 3

2009-01-02T11:34:00.004-06:00

Some relatives had given Cavan two Lego-like playsets for Christmas, one of pirates on a island and one of some Roman soldiers in a fortress of some sort. While we were setting it up, Cavan asked a question about how they fought each other. Wanting to impart some general historical knowledge, I replied that the Romans were dead long before the pirates came onto the scene.

Heath: "The Romans came first, and the pirates came along later."

Cavan: (Without skipping a beat) "And then came the super-heroes . . . "

Talk about revisionist history!

Happy New Year!

Happy . . . uh . . .

2008-12-29T09:27:00.002-06:00

I find the following amusing:

--Seculars who insist on saying "Happy Holidays", completely ignoring that "holidays" clearly shows its roots in "holy days."

--Anti-Catholic Christians who, in turn, insist on saying "Merry Christmas", ignoring the Catholic roots of the word "Christmas" as "Christ Mass." (Some denominations don't see Catholics as true Christians and regard the Mass as an "abomination.")

I find it hard to get worked up about this debate every year. I won't be boycotting any stores because the greeters have been instructed to say "Happy Holidays." And I've yet to come across a person offended when I've wished them a Merry Christmas.

By the way, Merry Christmas! We're currently at my folks' house (they finally got a decent Internet connection! Woo-hoo!) and enjoying the Christmas season (no, it's not over!). May God bless you all during this joyous time!

Make it stop!

2008-12-16T21:24:00.002-06:00

Well, it's only fitting to post this video (Catholic musicians, unfortunately) immediately after the wonderful one in my previous post. This one made my eyes and ears bleed. I would have laughed if the vomit hadn't filled my mouth. Click with caution.

(shudder)

CMAA Colloquium 2008 Video

2008-12-15T11:53:00.002-06:00

OK, I'm going to try to embed this darn video. My attempt will be at the bottom of the post.

This is the conference that I attended last summer in Chicago. This is a wonderful video put together by one of the attendees. You can see me around 53-55 seconds in and my back around 1:03.

The music for this conference was stunning . . . what a joy to sing this music all week with such wonderful musicians. Man, if all the parishes in the US had this music on a weekly basis, we'd have to fight the converts off with a stick! (this means you, Jeremy!)

Christmas Music meme

2008-12-15T10:41:00.002-06:00

Tagged by Tracy . . .

If you were trapped on a desert island and it was Christmas and all you had was a small generator, Christmas lights for your coconut tree, an endless supply of Christmas cookies and eggnog, your CD player and 6 Christmas CDs , which 6 albums would you want them to be? If you can find Amazon links, we can listen to snippets...

Well, I love Christmas music so this is a toughie! I have tried something a little different this year though in regards to my Xmas music listening. Each year, I find it very difficult to battle the secular Christmas season going from the day after T-giving to Dec. 25th; on my calendar, that's Advent! When the Xmas season is just starting (Dec. 25), the Xmas music disappears from the radio, lights on houses go down, and Xmas trees are on the curb. It makes it much more difficult to actually celebrate the Xmas season which lasts (traditionally) until Jan. 6, though a bit longer in the revised liturgical calendar.

Anyway, as much as I love Christmas music, I'm forcing myself this year to hold off until Dec. 17, when the focus in the Advent liturgical season focuses from Christ's Second Coming in glory to his First Coming as a babe. So far, so good . . . kind of. Every year I'm forced to immerse myself in Christmas music for our Xmas concert and Mass at work, and we had a Xmas party last weekend which included Xmas carols being sung; but beyond that, I haven't touched my Xmas piano books or CDs yet! We haven't even put up our Christmas tree (we'll do that on the 17th as well).

OK, on to my list, in no particular order:

1) Charlie Brown Christmas (link): A classic, sure to be on many people's lists. I watched the show every year as a child, and the music adds so much. Vince Guaraldi is one of my favorite jazz pianists; a shame that he died relatively young.

2) Sing We Christmas (Chanticleer) (link): Chanticleer is an all-male ensemble that sings nearly exclusive acappella music, from chant to pop. Their Christmas concerts (I've attended 2 or 3) are legendary. They've cut numerous Xmas albums, but this is the best, IMO.

3) Once As I Remember (Monteverdi Choir) (link): The conductor, John Eliot Gardiner, is well-known for his Bach interpretations. It's a real treat to hear this wonderful choir sing a mostly acappella set under his direction. Gardiner grew up in England, and has fond memories of the Christmas "play" that his family would do when he was young. Costumes, sets, full choir . . . people would come from all around to participate or to watch. The set list of this album is the music that was performed for those plays. Great stuff and wonderfully done!

4) Christmas (Kirk Franklin and the Family) (link): My first experience with his music (gospel-style) was when I was a student singing in the annual Christmas concert put on by the school choirs of U of I. The Black Chorus, at over 100 strong, sang "The Night That Christ Was Born" from this album, and I swear I was a changed man after that. It was stunning; in fact, it was better than the recording on this album, but this one has to take a lot of the credit. Some of the stuff on here is cheeeeeeesy, but the aforementioned track, "Silent Night", and "Now Behold the Lamb" make it worth the while.

5) Carols from Trinity (The Choir of Trinity College-Richard Marlow) (link): Buy these CDs! The current price on Amazon is 12 bucks for 2 CDs of almost 60 tracks! The singing is wonderful; this is a chamber choir of about 24, with that pure English soprano sound that I love. There's lots of great arrangements of familiar carols, as well as some serious choral stuff. This is a great buy!

6) Gregorian Chant for the Church Year (link): It's a real shame that this disc is unavailable. These settings of Propers for the Christmas season are sung very well and very prayerfully.

A few more CDs that I want to add to my collection at some point:

--An Ella Fitzgerald Christmas CD. I love her and her Xmas interpretations are probably a lot better than some of the dreck you hear on the stations now.

--Josh Groban: Noel. I checked it out from the library a few weeks ago, and it's pretty good. A couple regrettable songs, if I recall, but pretty strong overall. He's a talented guy.

--Compilation CD of all the standard interpretations of Xmas songs. Wouldn't it be great to have a CD with Nat's "Christmas Song" (sorry, Tracy), Elvis' "Blue Christmas", Andy Williams' "It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year", etc. all on one disc? Pop it in and let it ride!

Back in the mix . . .

2008-12-13T17:22:00.002-06:00

Sorry for the silence . . . we've been otherwise occupied.

--Spent 10 days(!) at my folks' house over Thanksgiving break. Shan had a conference in Chicagoland, so I decided to go south with the young 'uns as opposed to taking them on myself for 3 days. Shan took the train down and met us later.

The time off was wonderful. It's been a hectic semester at work and I felt a little weary. I got to lounge around, reading books, eating, sleeping, visiting with family . . . time well spent!

--Things were hectic the week after. Our Christmas concert was on the 6th, and it's always a bit crazy right before that. The concert was outstanding: all the choirs did a great job, we had a nice crowd, and we had a "Christmas Mass" afterwards with brass, strings, and a choir of almost 50. I always forget to enjoy these events until it's almost too late . . . it's so much work to get things off the ground, and then I worry right up to the starting time, convinced that I've forgotten to do something. Anyway, so far, they've all turned out very well, and I get a little less stressed each year. Another decade, and I won't even break a sweat!

--The week after the concert is always great; time to catch up on other work projects that I'd neglected, but also in a less frantic manner. Almost no deadlines at this point, thank Heavens. It was nice to spend more family time as well: starting on the Sundy after T-giving, I was at work for some period of time for 11 straight days (it would have been 13, but I had a funeral to attend on Thursday)! My poor kiddos were feeling a little daddy-deprived, so I've tried to make a concerted effort to enjoy their company this past week. I'll get a nice long break around Christmas and they're looking forward to that as well.

--We'll try to knock out a few more posts before Xmas, and then we'll be on hiatus again, I suspect.

Can you hear me now?

2008-11-18T23:58:00.003-06:00

So, I was just complaining to Heath the other day (which he has to endure far too often these days as my belly expands, my pelvis loosens and our kids are crabby) that our children ask me "What?" far too many times in one day. I told him I really do need to get their hearing screened. Honestly, I really do think it is a matter of them not paying attention to me, but just in case I should get it looked at as I had many ear issues as a youngster. I just can't cope with the pure repetition multiple times a day. I REALLY, REALLY, REALLY dislike having to repeat myself or feeling like I am not being listened to.

Well, tonight as we were getting ready for bed, I had a very timely conversation w/ Kellyn.

Kellyn: Mama, what you said?
Me: I said that I am going to have everyone in this household get their hearing tested.
Kellyn: (right on cue) What?!

Anyone have an otoscope I can borrow?

Homeschooling, Part 2--Socialization

2008-11-15T12:20:00.004-06:00

See the first installment here. Yes, I wrote it in September 2007!

(Disclaimer: Through these posts, I by no means mean to disparage those who have decided that homeschooling is not the best option for their family. There are definitely some parents out there that should not homeschool. I do think, though, that all things being equal, homeschooling is superior to public/private schooling, and I'll try to show that.

Secondly, as our kids are still very young, keep in mind that a lot of this is still theoretical for us. The rubber will be really hitting the road in the next few years!)

One of the first objections you hear when the topic of homeschooling is brought up: "What about socialization?" The objector has two presuppositions in mind when saying this: 1) Homeschooled kids don't get adequate/"normal" socialization and 2) Public schooled kids do. I would say that you can't make presuppositions on either of those points.

The latter first: socialization in the public schools. I would think that any rational individual who has experienced public schooling (such as myself), and can objectively reflect on their time there, would have to admit that there are some flaws in the way that our children are "socialized." Most would probably even admit that there are serious flaws.

Example: The "Playground Effect" When I was in elementary school, there were basically three groups of people: the bullies, the bullied, and everyone else. The first group was usually admired (or feared), the second group was scorned and ridiculed, and the third group pretty well stayed to themselves. This description simplifies things somewhat, but it held true for the most part in my school.

(I just remembered this great quote from "A Christmas Story":

"The lines were clearly drawn--like a kid caste system--you were either a Bully, a Toady, or one of the nameless rabble of Victims." Well said.)

I remember one poor soul in my class who was ridiculed mercilessly from the first day of kindergarten until the last day of our senior year. (Well, maybe he was given a day off here and there . . . ) What kind of "socialization" was he receiving? Do you think he entertained any suicidal thoughts? Probably daily . . .

A source of shame for me: often, I was one of the ones ganging up on him. Gosh, I can't say I really even disliked the guy, but I wanted to be in the "cool" crowd, and that's how most of that group spent their recess time every day; torturing this poor kid. Peer pressure at its worst.

I digress: Anyway, the point is that this "caste" system is devastating on our children's well-being. No one would say that bullies have "normal" social skills, nor do the bullied. The third group has to maintain vigilance so as not to induce the ire of the first group, nor accidentally be associated with the second group. This system starts as early as age 5!

The schools suffer from a policy called "age segregation": if you're 7 years old, you're in a class full of 7 year-olds. This is done with the educational side in mind primarily, but it has some drawbacks from the social side of things. First off, is this situation replicated anytime in someone's life after college? Is there any workplace which only hires 28-year olds? The reality is that it's necessary to identify and relate to people of all ages, not just your immediate age-group. But from Kindergarten, our children spend 9 months a year, 5 days a week, 5-7 hours a day with no one but kids the same age. During these formative years, years that will affect how they interact with the world the rest of their lives, they learn their social skills from their peers. This is nuts.

This clearly bleeds over into family life. I was a total jerk to my younger brothers (6 and 8 years my junior) when we were growing up, and I think the age segregation mindset of "people in other age groups are inferior" was a big influence in this. (Note: You rarely see this problem with homeschoolers.)

Another example: Each of my brothers had a cousin his age that they were very close with. They hung out a lot since they were little and never tired of each other's company. And yet when I would try to be courteous to these younger boys, it would turn into a very awkward social situation. They would look down at the floor, shift uncomfortably, mumble a few words and then run off as soon as they could. Good Lord, I wasn't giving them a job interview, I was just trying to be polite. This seems to be the norm though; why are we so uncomfortable to converse with different age groups?

What about a social "model"? Someone who can "teach" a young person how to interact with their fellow man? This is another flaw in the "system": we expect our children to learn how to socialize through osmosis, basically, trial and error. Why can't parents take more of a role, through example and instruction, in instilling good socialization skills in our young people?

Unfortunately, many adults often are very poor social models themselves. I'll admit, some kids from crappy homes are probably better off at school.

A personal example: let's take a typical day for me from about 5th grade to 12th grade. Wake up around 6:30, see my dad for five minutes before he left for work, ride to school with my mom, spend all day with my peer group, basketball/baseball practice after school, come home, have dinner with my family (approx. 20-30 minutes), then, either watch TV, do homework, talk on the phone, etc., but something definitely away from my parents for the most part. And so, in a typical school day, I was spending a max of 1 hour of my 16-hour day with one of my parents. Don't get me wrong: I love my parents dearly, and I feel very blessed to have had them, and I think that they are wonderful parental figures . . . but where was I learning how to relate to friends, teachers, girls? Peers.

Honestly, I feel like I came out of my public schooling years somewhat socially unscathed . . . and yet, I feel a lot of shame when I reflect back on a lot of the choices that I made before the age of . . . oh 25. A lot of my values and decision-making skills were compromised by peer influences and I had to work hard to eliminate the vestiges of these effects once I left college.

OK, enough complaining, what's the alternative?, you ask . . . A few aspects of a good homeschooling socialization "program":

--Parents, with good social skills themselves, as role models. Through example and instruction, parents teach their children how to interact with others. Lots of parent time is essential.

--Parental-monitored social activities. Play groups, study groups, church groups, sleepovers, pizza parties . . . these are all activities where the child to parent ratio will be low and where the social influences can be monitored.

--Interaction with families with similar values. A 4-year old shouldn't have to ask me why his best friend has two daddies; we can deal with that stuff when they're ready.

--Social interactions with people of different ages. Aunts, cousins, siblings, the check-out lady at the supermarket, the mechanic, the priest, newborn babies, etc. We're sharing the earth with all of them, so it's important that we can effectively communicate with them.

One more anecdote: During our senior year of college, Shan and I were attending a performance at the Krannert Center. She went to the restroom beforehand, and came out with a half-smile. I asked her what was up, and she told me that while in the restroom, a young girl of about 10 or so had complimented an older woman on her nice coat while they were washing hands. The women was a bit taken aback since such a young girl was initiating a conversation (as was Shannon), yet delighted that a child of that age would pay such a nice compliment. The conversation went on for a bit, cordially, and then the older woman asked the girl what school she attended; yep, you guessed it, she was homeschooled. This was one of the experiences that pushed Shannon over the hump in regards to homeschooling.

More could be said, but my children are clamoring for some "daddy-time." : )

Oh, and if you're still not convinced, you will be after reading this article.

Change?

2008-11-13T18:06:00.005-06:00

The following quotes by Catholic Bishops were taken from here. It is encouraging to see some conviction and courage to speak out against the popular culture.

Cardinal O’Malley (Boston): “My joy (over an African-American being elected President), however, is tempered by the knowledge that this man has a deplorable record when it comes to prolife issues, and is possibly in the pocket of Planned Parenthood, which, in its origins, was a very racist organization to eliminate the blacks, and it’s sort of ironic that he’s been co-opted by them.”

Cardinal George (Chicago): “If the Supreme Court’s Dred Scott decision, that African Americans were other people’s property and somehow less than persons, were still settled constitutional law, Mr. Obama would not be President of the United States. Today, as was the case a hundred and fifty years ago, common ground cannot be found by destroying the common good. The common good can never be adequately incarnated in any society when those waiting to be born can be legally killed at choice.”

I find the whole issue perplexing, especially given that 1/3 of the African-American population has been lost to abortion since 1973. African-American women undergo abortions at a rate 4-5 times that of Caucasian women. It's a wonder that Obama doesn't see how his race is under attack. The Guttmacher Institute (research institute for abortions and Planned Parenthood) claims it is because of a disparity in access to contraceptives and adequate women's healthcare. Let's assume that is correct (which I don't think it is), I personally don't think greater access to contraceptives is going to fix the problem. Since contraceptives have been introduced (which were supposed to lower the rates of unintended pregnancies and therefore, lower the rates of abortion), the rates of divorce, abortion and transmission of STDs have all risen. That's like offering a band-aid when someone needs a blood transfusion.

Our attitudes need to change. Our hearts need to change. Life needs to become less about convenience and more about serving one another. I sincerely hope change is coming for America, Mr. Obama. I hope American hearts are changed to see the goodness and light inherent in all life. I pray we all change in the way God is calling us, to grow as children of His light and love. Is this the change you are seeking, Barack?

Barama supporters: Dazed and Confused?

2008-11-10T21:13:00.001-06:00

OK, last Barama shot for awhile, I almost promise.

I have no idea how to embed a youtube video here (and I'm too lazy to learn), so here's the link:

http://the-american-catholic.com/2008/11/06/defeat-in-victory/#comments

Hilarious.

Prelude to Greatness, Part 2

2008-11-08T10:31:00.002-06:00

(Heath and Cavan are playing with Mancala "marbles.")

Heath: "OK, Cav, let's count how many each of us has."

Cavan: "1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 14, 16, 18, 20, 40, 60, 80!"

Heath: "Um, Cav, we need to work on your counting a bit, pal. Watch . . . 1, 2, 3, 4, . . . "

Cavan: "Stop! Don't count!"

Heath: "I'm just trying to help you count, buddy."

Cavan: "You count your way, I'll count my way!"

He's already recognized how arbitrary our numerical system is! Genius!

Post-Election Thoughts

2008-11-08T10:07:00.003-06:00

Well, I'm sure it's no secret that our household was saddened by the results of the Tuesday election. Time to move forward though . . .

--In all honesty, even a McCain victory would have been bittersweet. I wasn't terribly excited about the guy; he was just the lesser of two evils in my book.

--BO does bring some positives to the table. He's the anti-Bush, it seems: smooth, polished, good speaker, shatters a lot of racial stereotypes. From this standpoint, I think he could move the country forward. On a purely political viewpoint, though, I'm not very optimistic . . .

--I'm a little torn about the race issue. On one hand, I'm tremendously proud that our country has come this far in 40-50 years that a man of color could take the highest position in the land. This brings hope to so many people and will shatter many racial barriers that our country still faces.

On the other hand, I'm saddened that many voters chose Barama solely on his race alone. I even came across an article in a major liberal publication that pushed this line of thinking: Vote for BO because he's black. Period. That's nuts.

Follow-up: 1) Is it safe to say that that the country's liberals wouldn't have been quite so excited about such an historic occasion if a black Republican (yeah, there are a few out there) had taken the election? What would have been the reaction if someone like Alan Keyes had won? Crickets . . . 2) An honest question: BO had a black father and a white mother. Why is he seen as "black" and not "white"? What if he had married a white woman? Or if he himself looked more white? Would it be viewed the same same way in America's eyes? I mean, there would be no biological difference . . . seriously, does anyone have any insight into this? I honestly don't know how this works.

--Could BO be in a better political position right now? Democrats own the House and Senate, Republicans are licking their wounds and are weakened, the economy will improve in his presidency (because it can hardly get worse), the rest of the world is excited about someone other than Bush in office . . . he's got the world on a string. Unless he really blows it (which I'm not ruling out), no way does he lose in 2012.

It's a depressing thought, actually. I observed to Shannon the other day that our son will be 12 years old when BO leaves the Oval Office. 8 years is a long time. Who knows what the country will look like then.

--All this being said, I'm going to try my best to give the guy a shot, and to support him when he comes into office. Hey, he's at the helm now, and as BO goes, so goes the country. Don't blow it, pal!

OK, those are the last BO ramblings until he tries to sign the Freedom of Choice Act. God forbid.

Nursing Funnies

2008-11-05T19:46:00.002-06:00

A couple of weeks ago, the kids and I were driving home from somewhere. Cavan asked where we were going and I said "home". Kellyn protested, saying she didn't want to "live in our house". I asked her where she wanted to go live then. Cavan inquired, "Texas? Do you want to go live in Texas, Tew (Kel)?" He has a puzzle of the USA and Texas is one of the states he knows by shape and name. ;) She said yes. I then proceeded to ask who was going to help me with the new baby after he/she arrived. Both children immediately went into a chorus of "I do, I will, I, I, I!!!" (We'll see if these eager beavers remain when I am changing wet/dirty diapers. ;) Kellyn next went into her list of how she is going to help with the baby, who at that time was most definitely a "her" in Kellyn's world. Here is the remainder of the conversation:

Kellyn: I will rock-y her, and sing to her and nurse her . . .

Cavan: But Tewyn (Kellyn), you tan't (can't) nurse the new baby beetuz (because) you don't have big nursies wite (like) mama. You just have widdow (little) nursies. You have to wait tiw (till) they det (get) bidder (bigger). 'Tay, Tew? ('Kay, Kell?)

I couldn't help but laugh out loud in amusement. ;) Cavan was curious about my laughter. It's nice to remember these moments, especially after having a tumultuous day like today with my spirited daughter.

2 years and counting!

2008-11-01T19:40:00.002-05:00

We started this blog on November 1, 2006. It's been a good outlet for both of us and we hope to stay motivated to continue it for a while . . . it would be fun if we held out until out kids could contribute as well!

This is post number 103; I was really hoping to get in 104 by today so we could maintain an average of one post per week. Maybe Shan will put in a light post before midnight! Anyway, thanks for reading.

Today is All Saints Day: All Holy Men and Women, Pray for us.

A prelude to greatness

2008-11-01T19:34:00.003-05:00

Cavan: "Dad, did you know that snakes can do everything?"

Dad: "Really? . . . Like what?"

Cavan: " . . . I don't know."

Harvard Law School, here we come!

Random election thoughts

2008-10-31T06:46:00.002-05:00

With the election around the corner and a bleak outcome expected, an assemblage of random items:

--A positive either way the election turns out: no more whining about Bush.

--Whichever way you look at it, this is an historic election in the history of our country. So much is at stake . . . I'm actually quite fearful.

--It's a shame that the race issue is so prominent in this election. The fact that Barama is (half) black shouldn't make a difference either way: the bigots won't vote for him just because he's black and many on the other side are voting for him just because he's black. I saw a link last week in which an interviewer stopped a number of people on the street in Harlem and talked politics with them. Here was the twist: he attributed McCain's policies (and even choice of VP) to Barama. No one even caught it . . . they agreed with all his policies . . . even though they were McCain's policies. This happens on both sides, no doubt.

So what I wonder: where would BO be right now if he was white and was named "Joe Smith"? He probably wouldn't have made it out of the primary . . . reasons: "too liberal", "not enough experience", etc.

--Along those same lines: seriously, have we ever had a president with so few credentials as BO? I really wish McCain would have continued the "rhetoric vs. record" card he played during the second debate. Heck, I could stand up and talk about hope/change and promise to lower taxes, end world hunger, put people on Mars, etc., but if I had no history of actually doing any of that, shouldn't you cast some doubt on my qualifications? Not in this election it seems . . .

--A previous commenter in my "Electoral College" post said that he's in favor of as little direct democracy as possible. I'm starting to agree when you look at the ignorance of most voters. How about a little quiz before you get to enter a booth? "Name the three branches of government." "Who are your 2 senators?" "Who did we fight in the American Revolution?" Etc. You don't get a certain percentage right, you don't vote.

--A glimmer of hope with a BO presidency: one of my uncles and I had a discussion and I mentioned that I was a bit scared of what a man like that would do in the White House. And then I thought, "Well, he hasn't really done anything in a decade in office, maybe we'll luck out and he won't do anything of note in the White House." We can hope, I guess.

--A prediction: if Barama wins, I'll immediately start seeing fewer "End the War: Bring our Troops Home" signs in people's yards. The vociferous anti-war crowd will get a lot quieter with a democrat in the Oval Office.

--You know how you always see those commercials with a politician talking with a farmer in the middle of a cornfield, sleeves rolled up, in the crouch position? Or him in a hard hat in a factory, supposedly talking about union issues? They may really do this stuff, I don't know . . . is it safe to say that no politician has visited a Planned Parenthood and watched a late-term abortion? Have they ever watched them pull the infant out of the birth canal by the leg and jam the scissors into the back of their skull? Doubtful.

--I'm praying for a miracle.

Bragging Rights

2008-10-28T14:15:00.003-05:00

Happy 100th post! Fitting that it would be about one of my children . . .

Cavan has always LOVED books and recently has shown a great interest in small words he can identify. Heath has taken the reins on this one and Cavan now knows over 40 words by sight! Very exciting for us to watch, especially now that we have borrowed some "easy readers" from the library that he can actually read and work through on his own. I will admit, there are a few little books he just knows by rote but many times a day, he will stop me while I am reading a magazine or book, or a truck with a logo passing by and say "Hey Mama, that says (insert word he knows)!" It is so neat watching his face light up as he begins to unlock this wonderful world of reading.

I won't exhaust you with the entire list but here are some words he knows:

I, you, Daddy, Mommy, God, Jesus, me, big, go, up, and, car, Cavan, zoo, good, boy, like, is, book, fun, run, cat, pizza, see, ball, small, little, sun, dog, night, walk

We are very blessed with our children and are continually amazed at how bright they are. No, I assure you, we are NOT biased. ;)

See, homeschooling isn't so hard! I guess you should check back with me during later years to see if I still hold that same sentiment. ;) Thank you for letting me "brag".

Pretty in Pink

2008-10-23T03:17:00.005-05:00

Well, it's that time of year and since I have been complaining to Heath about it for 2-3 years in a row, I figured I should just blog on it to release frustration and give him a break. ;) Every time September rolls around, people start gearing up for "Breast Cancer Awareness" month. Pink ribbons pop up everywhere and fundraisers galore begin. Before you jump to the conclusion that I am anti-cure-for-cancer, let me explain.

I am 100%, wholeheartedly behind discovering a cure, not only for breast cancers but for the many others that also plague our society. If it is a spiritual cure you are seeking, well . . . you are not going to find it in a lab. ;) However, it irks me that throughout the entire month of October and in the midst of all the Breast Cancer Awareness activities, NO ONE is mentioning things you can do to lower your risk of developing breast cancer. *This* is one of the huge problems of our society. We focus on what to do AFTER something bad has happened instead of also focusing some efforts on prevention. What's that saying about "an ounce of prevention . . ."?

I realize there are various factors that go into who develops cancer and how severe it is. I am not saying by following the below steps you will never develop breast cancer. However, your risk will be much lower. Here are some things to do:

Breastfeed your baby/babies. The total duration of breastfeeding over a mama's lifetime directly correlates to a reduction in risk of developing breast cancer. So, if I have three children that I breastfed for 3 months, my total amount of protection is 9 months worth of breastfeeding. However, if I up the breastfeeding time to an entire year for each child (which is what the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends), my total amount of reduced risk is 3 years! For more information and/or support on breastfeeding, please contact your local La Leche League (LLL) or call me. I love to talk about the benefits of nursing! ;)
Have a baby before the age of 25. I recall seeing this actual number somewhere, but can't find my source. However, it is known that women who wait until after 30 to have children (I realize this is not always in our control!), have a higher risk of developing breast cancer.
Avoid an abortion. This can be a touchy one to advertise given our society/culture's current stance on making sure no one feels guilty for choices they have made. I certainly am not here to say women should feel guilty for having an abortion. However, I do believe that for TRULY INFORMED CONSENT to happen in an abortion procedure, women NEED to be informed that they are increasing their risk for breast cancer down the road (as well as other negative physical, emotional and mental side effects). They need to know it is not a "quick fix" without potential consequences. For more information on the connection, visit Abortion-Breast Cancer Link. If you or someone you know are suffering the effects of an abortion, there is support out there. Please visit the Silent No More Campaign (to bring awareness to the devastating effects of an abortion on moms), Rachel's Vineyard (for healing support/retreats), and Women Deserve Better (sponsored by Feminists for Life). Women DO deserve better and they deserve to have full disclosure of the total impact of their choices on future health.
Avoid use of hormonal contraceptives/birth control, including pill form, vaginal rings, IUDs and injectable forms. Taken from this source:

It is now well established that birth control medications (contraceptive steroids) increase breast cancer risk, especially if they are taken before the first full-term pregnancy, when breast cells are still immature. Birth control pills are very commonly used by young women. In one study, women who took birth control pills before the age of 20 had a more than ten-fold increased risk of breast cancer. The longer the pill is used, the higher the risk. Contraceptive steroids increase risk whether they are given orally (i.e., ‘the pill’), by injection (e.g., Depo-Provera), implantation, through the skin with a patch, intravaginally with a ring (e.g., Nuva Ring) or with an intrauterine device (IUD). Even ‘low dose’ estrogen pills have been associated with higher breast cancer risk.
This is usually a risk written in very fine print on the 16+ page insert women receive with their contraceptives. In an ideal world, every woman would read through that before consenting to ingest these. But let's be realistic, most of the women I knew in college on contraceptives dropped it in the recycling bin. Again, doctors should be informing their patients of both the risks and benefits, not just writing a script to mask symptoms or please a patient.
Avoid Hormonal Replacement Therapy (HRT). This also goes along with increasing breast cancer risk when a woman's body is exposed to excess estrogen. Although I am not nearing menopause yet, there are natural aids to help the process.
Eat a well balanced diet full of broccoli, brussel sprouts and Omega-3 fatty acids! Again, taken from previous source:
Indole-3-carbinol is found in cruciferous vegetables such as cauliflower and broccoli. This chemical is converted by the stomach to DIM, which causes estrogen to be metabolized into an inactive estrogen that does not stimulate breast tissue to proliferate and thereby reduces breast cancer risk. DIM is also widely available in pill form, as a nutritional supplement.
Your mom wasn't kidding when she said broccoli was good for you!!! As for the Omega-3s, I am more convinced of their benefits with each passing month as I read and hear more about them:
These essential fatty acids are found in fish and many vegetable oils. Postmenopausal women who eat olive oil daily reduce their risk of breast cancer by 25%. Vegetable oils rich in omega-3 fatty acids include canola, flax seed, walnut and olive oils.
If you are not fish eaters (like me!), supplements are readily available.
Limit alcohol consumption. Not saying you cannot drink. I personally enjoy a high-quality beer now and then. Well, not now so much any more . . . but perhaps sometime after March. ;) According to the Breast Cancer Prevention Institute (BCPI),
"By inhibiting liver function, alcohol decreases the body's ability to change estrogen into the inactive form and therefore, increases risk. "
Don't smoke! Again, the BCPI:
Recent studies suggest that cigarette smoking before having children-especially among teenagers-also increases premenopausal breast cancer risk substantially. Benzopyrenes in cigarette smoke act as direct carcinogens to cells lining the milk ducts.
Exercise!
Exercise is also important in reducing breast cancer risk. Overall, moderate exercise can reduce breast cancer risk by 30%. Exercise also can prevent obesity, which increases breast cancer risk. Exercise can delay the onset of a woman's first menstrual cycle, menarche, which also decreases breast cancer risk. Exercise may result in anovulatory, and therefore, low-estrogen menstrual cycles, thus decreasing risk.

All above quotes are taken from a pamphlet available from the Breast Cancer Prevention Institute. I found the Risk/Prevention section the most enlightening.

Now, there are factors in life that we can never control and one of those involves genetics. There are two types of genes that cause breast cancer, one is less agressive (BRCA-1) than the other (BRCA-2). Breastfeeding will still help lower a woman's risk if she has BRCA-1, possibly up to 45% which is encouraging. An article on WebMD reports:

The researchers reported that among women with BRCA1 mutations, those who developed breast cancer breastfed for an average of six months, compared to almost nine months for women who did not develop breast cancer.

Now ladies, trust me, I KNOW nursing can be stressful and overwhelming at times. But really, another mere three months of breastfeeding separated the breast cancer victims and healthy women. Isn't our own health worth it? I do realize there are many moms who have difficulties nursing and I believe much of that is due to our lack of familial/societal support and how differently are families are spaced these days. A few generations ago, your mom, aunt, sister and cousin were all available nearby for breastfeeding support. Unfortunately, that is now a rarity. The BRCA-2 gene, which is more aggressive, did not seem to show a significant decline even in mothers who breastfed. Given the American way of breastfeeding, I would be interested in seeing results on women who breastfeed extendedly (1+ years). The upside is that the BCPI estimates 5-10% of breast cancer cases are caused by genetics, which means that we have the power to influence the other 90-95% of the cases!

It seems not everyone is interested in prevention though . . . true to America's MO, we would much rather spend the time and energy FIXING a problem after it has happened rather than PREVENT the problem before it occurs in the first place. (Hmmm . . . that sounds strangely familiar to our current financial problems . . .) The Susan G. Komen Foundation, a huge breast cancer cure fundraiser, sponsors many events all over the U.S. After finding out they contribute financially to Planned Parenthood (over $700,000 in the last year according to STOP Planned Parenthood) some years ago, I felt I could not donate to any Komen runs in the future. At the same time, I couldn't help but see the irony in an organization fighting for a cure (Komen) of a condition (breast cancer) that gives money to another organization (Planned Parenthood) that is partially responsible for causing the condition itself (breast cancer) by their own actions against women (namely, abortion). Can someone please explain the circular logic of giving money to a cause that is going to place those same women in one of your future fight-for-the-cure runs?

Recently, at a Colorado Race for the Cure event, the Colorado Right to Life displayed a provocative banner. Does that make any sense to you? Why are the cure and prevention mutually exclusive?

One last thought to this massive post (thanks for sticking with me!), this organization struck me with their expose on the many products marketed for "Breast Cancer Awareness", some that are actually harmful to human bodies, the environment, etc. and just further contribute to the pockets of massive business owners playing off of peoples' emotions surrounding diseases/cures. I especially enjoyed their jab at Yoplait and their use of rGBH (growth hormones) in their dairy products. Why do I have to choose between affordable yogurt and my family's health?

Our health is our responsibility. No one is going to take care of us FOR us. So, let's at least arm women with accurate information so they can directly make choices to impact their own personal health, for better or worse.

Federal Budget in Family terms

2008-10-22T11:29:00.001-05:00

Great post by a friend here.

Baby Talk

2008-10-21T20:47:00.002-05:00

Just realized the other day that we haven't officially announced our happy news here on the family blog . . .

For those of you who have not heard, we are expecting baby #3 in March! Everyone is very excited and looking forward to little hands to hold, coos to hear and a sweet newborn smell to breathe in. Cavan has already decided it's a boy and Kellyn has decided it is a girl. Cavan is open to a girl, however, Kellyn in NO way is having a boy. She became very crabby at the mere suggestion that the new baby might be a boy. ;) We'll cross that bridge when and if we get to it I guess.

Please pray for us as we will soon be "outnumbered"!

Taxes for Dummies (Me included)

2008-10-16T14:29:00.002-05:00

Suppose that every day, ten men go out for beer and the
bill for all ten comes to $100. If they paid their bill
the way we pay our taxes, it would go something like this:

The first four men (the poorest) would pay nothing.
The fifth would pay $1.
The sixth would pay $3.
The seventh would pay $7.
The eighth would pay $12.
The ninth would pay $18.
The tenth man (the richest) would pay $59.

So, that's what they decided to do.

The ten men drank in the bar every day and seemed quite
happy with the arrangement until one day the owner threw
them a curved ball (or is that a curved beer!).
'Because you are all such good customers,' he
said, 'I'm going to reduce the cost of your daily
beer by $20.'

Drinks for the ten now cost just $80.

The group still wanted to pay their bill the way we pay
our taxes so the first four men were unaffected. They
would still drink for free. But what about the other six men
- the paying customers? How could they divide the $20
windfall so that everyone would get his 'fair share?'

They realized that $20 divided by six is $3.33. But if
they subtracted that from everybody's share, then the
fifth man and the sixth man would each end up being paid to
drink his beer.

So, the bar owner suggested that it would be fair to
reduce each man's bill by roughly the same amount, and
he proceeded to work out the amounts each should pay. And
so:

The fifth man, like the first four, now paid nothing (100% savings).
The sixth now paid $2 instead of $3 (33% savings).
The seventh now paid $5 instead of $7 (28% savings).
The eighth now paid $9 instead of $12 (25% savings).
The ninth now paid $14 instead of $18 (22% savings).
The tenth now paid $49 instead of $59 (16% savings).

Each of the six was better off than before. And the first
four continued to drink for free. But once outside the
restaurant the men began to compare their savings.

'I only got a dollar out of the $20,' declared
the sixth man.. He pointed to the tenth man, 'but he
got $10!'

'Yeah, that's right,' exclaimed the fifth
man. 'I only saved a dollar too. It's unfair that
he got ten times more than me!'

'That's true!!' shouted the seventh man.
'Why should he get $10 back when I got only two?
The wealthy get all the breaks!'

'Wait a minute,' yelled the first four men in
unison. 'We didn't get anything at all. The
system exploits the poor!'

The nine men surrounded the tenth man and beat him up.
The next night the tenth man didn't show up for drinks,
so the nine sat down and had beers without him. But when
it came time to pay the bill, they discovered something
important. They didn't have enough money between
all of them for even half of the bill!

And that, boys and girls, journalists and college
professors, is how our Tax System works. The people who
pay the highest taxes get the most benefit from a tax
reduction. Tax them too much, attack them for being wealthy
and they just may not show up anymore. In fact, they might
start drinking overseas where the atmosphere is somewhat
friendlier.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

For those who understand, no explanation is needed.
For those who do not understand, no explanation is
possible.

Financial impact of abortion

2008-10-15T18:17:00.001-05:00

Another angle on the issue:

Washington, DC (LifeNews.com) -- A researcher who has spent over a decade examining the economic impact of abortion finds that the approximately 50,5 million abortions in the U.S. since 1970 have cost the American economy $35 trillion. That comes in the form of lost productivity by having fewer workers contributing to society.

Those contributions also come in the form of taxpayers contributing to state, federal and local governments that would have had more funds to pay teachers, offer health care benefits or put more police on the streets.

The cost to the economy also includes the lost support for the social security system, which experts say still presents a host of challenges for the future and questions about whether younger Americans will receive anything from it.

Full article is here.

You know you have an addiction when . . .

2008-10-15T12:23:00.002-05:00

. . . . your 2.5 year old daughter asks for milk in the morning and then says after taking a sip, "Mmmm, it's yummy coffee mama!"

This usually happens in the morning, but really, ANYTIME she gets milk in a cup, she says "it's coffee". It's very cute, but does make me realize how much I LOVE my own coffee. ;)

Well, I guess there are worse things to be addicted to . . . maybe this Lent will have to see a decrease in caffeine. Gasp! Did I even say that out loud?! Never mind, forget what you have seen here. ;)

Electoral College

2008-10-13T21:44:00.002-05:00

Why hasn't the electoral college gone the way of the passenger pigeon? Doesn't this method of electing the president seem a little outdated?

Unless I'm mistaken (which is always a possibility), our founding fathers implemented this system because they just didn't really trust a true democratic process . . . let's face it, there's just some folks you don't want to see in the voting booth casting their bid for the most powerful man in the world (how about nearly everyone under the age of 25 . . . I shudder every time I read the Daily Illini). And so they used this system of allowing individuals to represent their state, in proportion to population, and to allow them to make the decision of whom to vote for.

Unfortunately, nearly all of our states (save two, I believe) have all their electoral votes go to the candidate with the majority vote in their voting booths. So even if a candidate just narrowly wins a state (let's say 51 percent to 49), he still gets every electoral vote! That seems nuts! Why not divvy them up percentage-wise? (Again, I think there are 2 states that actually do)

So what happens during this time is that candidates completely ignore states like ours since it's not really up for grabs. If McCain put a dime into trying to sway Illinois voters, he'd be nuts . . . same with Barama (sic) in the deep south. They're just not taking certain states and they know it.

And so what is the effect on voters? Well, it's no secret that voter turnout is pathetic; around 50 percent, if I recall. But is it really any surprise? Why take the time to vote in a state where the decision is basically predetermined? For example, let's say I'm a republican in Massachusetts, which historically falls to the democrats. Why even bother punching a vote for McCain? It's basically a wasted vote.

And so what happens every four years is each candidate battles overs the "swing states"; those that could go either way. Each voter in those states is casting a vote that is so much more important than my vote here in Illinois. All the campaign money goes into those states, hoping that winning the majority vote in Ohio or Florida will lead to the required number of votes from the college.

So in essence, votes in certain states are more important than votes in others. This seems absurd in a national election. The process needs reform.

I say do one of the following:

1) Get rid of it the electoral college. Majority vote wins.

2) Weight the states. If you win 60 percent of the votes, you win 60 percent of the electoral college votes. The math could get tricky though . . .

3) Flip a coin. Barama and McCain sit in a room and one of them calls heads or tails. Winner is president. Think of the drama!

It seems with 1) and 2), voter turnout, in theory, would grow immensely. Now everyone's vote counts equally and is therefore important. Many would probably take more of an interest in politics, as candidates may now actually campaign in other states, not just the swing states.

Why don't I ever hear of someone proposing to reform this system? You'd think after that farcical situation in the 2000 election that someone would have said "enough is enough."

Excessive American Materialism

2008-10-01T19:52:00.003-05:00

Well, I haven't had to deal with insomnia in my last two pregnancies, but I have heard from many other moms who have. A couple of weeks ago, I probably had 3-4 nights when I was up anywhere from bedtime until 4-6:30 in the morning. I can't imagine having that AND having to go to a "real job" the next day!

Anyway, on one of these nights, I flipped to HGTV (yes, Heath will make fun of me). It was a show about one couple moving from the Chicago suburb of Naperville to a suburb of Indianapolis where "housing is cheaper". They were an engaged couple with one dog and two cats. I missed the very beginning when they may have shared their careers, but I am guessing they were pretty well-paying as you will see from their housing budget. This was not their starter house, but keep in mind that they didn't have any children yet. So, what were they looking for?

They saw three properties, in the price range of $820,000 to $900,000. That's right, almost a million dollar homes. The one at the highest end had 5 bedrooms, 5.5 bathrooms (what do you do with 5.5 bathrooms and no children??) and was approximately 6,600 square feet. For those of you who have visited our home, that is about 5 times the size of our house. I would get lost in there!!! It was admittedly a gorgeous home, complete with a mini-wine cellar and a "hearth room" (which is apparently the latest "rage" in homes though I know nothing about them) next to the kitchen. The prospective buyers were concerned b/c it had a gigantic yard, but would need to be fenced for the animals and landscaping would need to be done, both adding to the overall purchase price for the home. However, in the end, that is the house they chose.

If someone else were awake with me at 1 a.m., they would have seen me with my jaw open the entire episode! I simply can't fathom what you do with a house that large, that expensive for two people and 3 relatively small animals, unless you are opening a shelter or orphanage of some sort. Now, maybe they plan on having 15 children and getting full use of their space. However, given their older-seeming age and the current mentality of our American culture towards large families, I would say that is unlikely. Who knows . . . maybe they will strive to be like the Duggars, or perhaps they will fill their house with the American average of 2.1 children (they
already have the pets). You can check out www.duggarfamily.com if you are unfamiliar with the reference.

Overall, this episode got me thinking about the larger issue in general, which is the extreme and excessive amounts of material goods that Americans possess (even if we can't afford them). It is almost as if you are not American if you are not striving for MORE house, MORE cars, MORE stuff, MORE, MORE, MORE! We fill our homes with "stuff" and cut out time with people. We buy items to keep up appearances or lift our moods or create further "needs" for more stuff (e.g. when you have lots of clutter, you then need to purchase items to organize the clutter . . . I am amazed at the advancement of some of our current organizational systems. The Container Store, anyone?). Our materialistic drives cost us in terms of sanity, simplicity, relationship and as we are now seeing in our country, economic security.

Now, I am not saying every single homebuyer who defaulted on their loan should not have bought a home, but why is our economy in this mess? I think it is partly due to our overspending with money we simply do not have. We put it on plastic and think/hope we can pay it back. We spend what we have before it is in our pockets. Most of us are not living on any kind of pre-planned budget, which contributes to our lack of knowledge over how much money we really do have as a family and how much we can comfortably spend. We also, like any good American ideal, take it to the extreme.

I also say shame on the mortgage lenders who approved families for home loans with the full knowledge that it would be too much of a burden on them to pay it back. I know when Heath and I bought our condo in Country Club Hills (which had neither a country club nor many hills), we were approved for far more than we could actually afford. I am glad we had the commonsense to see that and stick within a lower price range instead of assuming we could afford something $20,000 higher.

A couple of closing thoughts to this somewhat disjointed post . . . why are we buying so much stuff? What voids are we trying to fill? Why are we buying homes that are 5 times the size we might actually need in defense of fulfilling the "American dream"? Why are most of those homes sitting empty of people but full of pretty knick-knacks? When did it become more important to have a huge home than to contribute to society in worthwhile ways?

Don't get me wrong, I am not completely innocent either. I dream of the high-end minivan models, sleek and fast . . . well, okay, maybe just sleek. Heck, I'd settle for clean. I am sure I own far more stuff than I actually NEED. And each and every room in my home is currently slated for a "de-cluttering". Yes, I am a culprit to this mentality too. But I am honestly striving to break away from it. I am trying to find contentment and gratitude in all the amazing things we have been blessed with instead of those we do not currently have. I am attempting to find peace in the regular swing in our checking account, when Heath's checks are deposited and then the mortgage/bills/student loans are paid. I am trying to pare down and let go, to detach from all these earthly goods that won't mean a thing when I have passed. After all, Jesus had nowhere to lay his head as an adult. We are in a nice, comfy King-size bed, sheltered from the elements of nature. And I usually have two little sets of hands/feet poking and pushing me at some point in the night. What could be better than that?! Move over Container Store, there's nothing you have that can contain us!

"Just a Soccer Mom"

2008-09-13T12:55:00.003-05:00

I had meant to write this post a couple of weeks ago, shortly after Sarah Palin was first announced as McCain's running mate. But I'm a mom myself, so . . . ;)

I want to say first and foremost that, like in years past, I am disappointed that there is no ideal Presidential candidate for me to endorse. It would be nice to get excited about somebody! So, I am not necessarily 100% pro-McCain/Palin ticket, but I do acknowledge that Obama's stances on some issues are not my cup of tea at all.

I wanted to write a post after listening to some of the call-in criticisms from Americans on CNN after Palin was announced. The repeating mantra was, "She's *just* a soccer mom. What does she know about being a Vice President?" Here are some of my thoughts:

First of all, she's a hockey mom. Not a soccer mom. If we are going to discount her abilities solely based on her status of "mom", we should at least make sure we have the right description.
Many callers also said, "Democrats are 'smarter' than that . . ." in reference to McCain's choice, implying he solely chose Palin to sway some Democratic women. So those in the country who may vote for McCain/Palin are dumb??? Maybe Palin has something to offer that people genuinely like.
Multiple callers called McCain's move "desperate". I can see why they may say this, but at some point, another woman would have been nominated to the Presidency or Vice-Presidency. It's been over 20 years since Ferraro. I think people would have been calling a female move "desperate" whether it happened now or in the next 2-4 elections. I also think McCain could have picked Hillary Clinton herself and it would have been labeled "desperate" or "a ploy to sway voters". If people have already made up their minds about McCain, Palin is not going to change it. If they haven't, she may be a breath of fresh air.
Palin is inexperienced . . . ummm, Obama doesn't have much more on his plate.
She has been criticized for being a "pro-lifer" . . . and I am wondering why that is a "bad" thing. Aren't we all living, breathing human beings? Isn't life a good thing?
There were comments that "McCain will set women back decades if elected." Come on now, isn't that a little extremist? I really do not believe women nationwide are going to be expected or legislated to, handing dads their slippers and a cold drink as soon as they walk in the door from work. I don't think our right to vote is going to be revoked. I don't think we are going to be kicked out of the work place and asked to "go home". He has a couple of daughters of his own, I don't think he is a woman-hater.
One caller commented that Palin was "against abortion but says she stands for family values . . . so where are her 'family values'?" Okay . . . I don't follow this logic but since when does abortion = family values? I personally believe abortion has devastating effects on the whole family that creates long-lasting ripples physically, emotionally and mentally. I also personally believe that abortion creates increased aggression towards women in general. I think we as women are deluding ourselves if we think that separating ourselves and scoffing at our natural differences between men *is* progress. I don't think our differences limit us, but I do think they shouldn't be ignored.
I take issue that people are discounting her solely b/c she is a mom. Since when is being a mother a detriment to our government? It may not qualify her, but it shouldn't discredit her. I get similar reactions, even from well-meaning friends. Not in regards to working in the government, but in regards to being a stay-at-home mom. People will ask me, "Is there anything *else* you are doing?" I understand their intentions, but asking questions like that implies that I am not DOING anything by being a mom. It is exactly this attitude that contributes to our culture's de-valuation of the family and mothers in particular. In my case, I actually am doing other things (i.e. Bradley classes, speech-language pathology on a PRN basis) but even if I weren't, my job as a mom should be able to stand alone and be respected. I promise you, we do NOT sit around watching soaps and eating bon-bons all day. ;)

I am not trying to sway anyone to vote for McCain/Palin, but I did want to point out some of the silly criticisms she first received. There are probably more valid ones out there (not the gossip that the media spreads) and those are the ones we should address. I also encourage people to take a more critical eye to Obama. He may not be the quite the savior everyone is hoping he will be. But then again, maybe he will surprise me hugely.

I think it is awesome that McCain has a female running mate. I think it is wonderful that she is a pro-life mom who walks the walk as well as talking the talk. I think Washington needs more mothers. As long as society views pregnant women as a burden . . . birthing women as something to be managed and controlled . . . breastfeeding mothers as obscene . . .we will never truly be valued and have no hope of being sincerely respected or appreciated. The more we struggle against our nature, the more misery we bring to ourselves.

Barack-o-mania

2008-09-12T07:19:00.002-05:00

I admit to taking a vested interest in the election season this year, for the first time ever. I think in the past I tried to distance myself someone since the political scene is often depressing and in this year's case, more than a little scary.

I read Barack's book, The Audacity of Hope, last month, trying to give the man a fair shake. Can't say it impressed me much, and did very little good in regards to my pessimism for his potential presidency. I just finished a book called The Audacity of Deceit (after reading The Case Against Barack Obama a couple weeks ago) which changed my pessimism to alarm.

First off, let me express my condolences to our Democrat brethren across the land who have been stuck with such a unworthy candidate to vote for. The more they've learned about Barack since the primary, the more they've pined for Hillary, no doubt. I mean, this man is so vastly unqualified for the top office in the land that I've had a knot in my stomach for weeks just thinking about him being elected. And why his cult following refuses to analyze his credentials is beyond me . . . I guess just the words "hope" and "change" in the midst of his polished rhetoric are enough for them. Honestly, the only reason this guy has a shot is the displeasure with the last 4+ years of the Bush administration. If Bush had been even reasonably popular, the public would have squashed an Obama campaign right off the bat, citing his complete lack of . . . well, anything that might make him a viable candidate.

His political "resume":

--7 years in the Illinois State Senate, in which he voted "present" a staggering 130 times. This basically means that he was present for the vote, but decided not to vote yay or nay. Let's hear it for conviction! (A funny anecdote from one of the aforementioned books. During one of the votes, he was second in line. He voted "present", surprise, surprise, but felt pretty stupid when everyone else voted yay. It was unanimous except for him; he then petitioned to have his vote changed to yay. Bravo.)

--Less than a 150 days in the US Senate before declaring his run for the presidency. Wow, almost a whole six months.

Though his voting record is pretty meager (again, all the "present" votes aren't much to go on), it seems that Barack is pretty out of touch with the political views of his country at large. Barack is one of the most liberal members of Congress, running for president in a country that falls just right of center. Nearly all of his political views are in the minority of public opinion polls.

The most extreme (and disturbing) example: The Born-Alive Infants Protection Act. This bill was to provide medical treatment for those infants that survived a late-term abortion. It had nearly unanimous support, even by extreme pro-choice Senators such as Ted Kennedy and Barbara Boxer. Even NARAL didn't fight it. Barack opposed it. Hey, at least he had an opinion, albeit a jaw-dropping one.

So why is he getting a free pass? Why are no voting democrats taking a hard look at his political and social connections to terrorists, socialists, radical Christians, etc.? Why is no one calling him out on the fact that he's flip-flopped on a myriad of issues even since the primaries? When is the public going to rise up and say, "the emperor has no clothes!" I myself am terrified about where we might be as a country four years from now if he's allowed to take the helm.

What if . . . Institutionalized Schooling Edition, Part 2

2008-08-31T17:21:00.003-05:00

Part 1 is here.

And so on to the hypothetical: What if all the schools (public and private) in the US were closed tomorrow?

Well, let's ignore for now the uproar it would cause. Besides that, I think a number of interesting things would or might happen:

1) More parents would stay home with their kids and assume the responsibility of educating them. They would seek out other folks in a similar situation and collaborate to find the most effective way of doing it. Because of more parents leaving the work force, it would affect . . .

2) . . . unemployment. I have no idea how this would work, but it seems that unemployment would decrease, as more jobs would be open. (Though there would be an influx of unemployed teachers that would need to find new work as well)

3) No more tax money would be spent on these schools. These families going from two incomes down to one could get additional tax rebates to help keep the boat afloat, so to speak. This would be another incentive for a parent to stay home. I don't know about the rest of the money (presumably in the hundreds of millions(?) . . . could we keep it, perhaps? I'm not sure how the economy would be impacted by 2) and 3) . . .

4) Many children would thrive; many would not. I think that the learning that happens in a homeschooling environment (the way that our peers do it, at least) is far superior than it's public school counterpart. Thousands of children who did not find fulfillment in schools will be astonished at the wonders of exploring things in a way that's not mandated by the government.

There's no question that thousands of children with poor home lives would be worse off . . . I don't have a good answer for this. Maybe small schools could be set up for those children that need to get out of their houses for 30 hours a week? Just a few to a classroom though . . .

5) Non-governmental schools would be set up. With teachers out of a job, and parents who refuse to give up that second income, is it possible that new schools could be formed, without governmental regulations? Maybe it's just glorified homeschooling; a teacher with 10 kids, all exploring different things with an adult to guide them . . .

I don't know, maybe I'm on to something . . . what am I not thinking of?

What if . . . Institutionalized Schooling Edition

2008-08-30T14:00:00.003-05:00

(Disclaimer: This post is just me thinking out loud and is purely hypothetical. I'm not ready to start a petition to start legislation for the following. I've though about the topic for a total of 10 minutes and have done hardly any research that would back up some of my thoughts. So there.)

As you know, I'm a big homeschooling advocate. For reasons that I'll lay out in a large upcoming post (yes, the one I've been promising for almost 2 years now), I am convinced that, all things being equal, it's the absolute best way to raise our children both academically, morally, socially, etc.

And as I was reflecting on the fact that our public schools (and many private schools, for that matter) continually struggle to crank out a "finished product", so to speak, this question jumped to mind:

What if we just closed all the institutionalized schools in the nation?

Sure, it sounds a little drastic at first, but let's explore it a bit.

First off, if I could give two main reasons for the struggles of the public schools, in my opinion, I would offer the following (there are many others, clearly, but these are two biggies):

1) Unbalanced Student-to-Teacher Ration (i.e. too many students in a classroom)

2) Decline of the American family and society

The first seems obvious enough; a teacher could instruct much more effectively if she had 5 in her classroom as opposed to 25. This of course would never happen in a tax-funded educational system, as it would be cost-prohibitive.

The second seems obvious to me and to all the teachers that are currently in the trenches. The home lives of many of our children now are very different than they were fifty years ago (or so I hear : ) A few factors:

1) Astronomical divorce rate; many single-parent homes

2) Double-income families; "day-care" children

3) Lack of discipline in the home; enabling parents

4) Parental indifference; children feel unloved

5) Small family sizes; more than 2 children seen as burden

6) Effects of "culture of death"; measures taken to insure no unwanted children

7) TV/Computer; "third parent"

. . . among many others. Imagine the difficulty of teaching 20-25 children that are coming from this "typical" American household. Nearly none of these things were the case 50 years ago . . . it's easier to imagine a nun maintaining control of a classroom of 40-50 when each child had a healthy respect for their elders (which is clearly the exception now) and none of the previous factors listed.

OK, this is getting long . . . let's make this a 2-parter.

Pelosi on abortion

2008-08-30T13:38:00.003-05:00

Well, politics is (are?) on the forefront of many minds, mine as well. Unfortunately, another election in which I'm not passionate about either candidate . . . the frontrunners are men I would hardly trust to mow my grass, much less run our country. How depressing . . .

Anyway, I'd like to post further on some political topics in the near future, but Pelosi first. Our "Catholic-Challenged" House Speaker, Nancy Pelosi, went above her "pay-grade" last week and tried to wax theological on the topic of abortion and its relation to Church teaching. The results were jaw-dropping; as if she wasn't detested enough by Catholics.

It's funny because she's the second woman in a month (the other was on a local yahoogroup) that has believed, regrettably, that the abortion issue is up for grabs in the Catholic Church. It's amazing that in this Internet age, these two ladies wouldn't just google "catholic & abortion" and read a few items randomly. Lord knows the Church isn't trying to keep our stance a secret; geez, it's right in our Catechism for all to see:

"Human life must be respected and protected absolutely from the moment of conception. From the first moment of his existence, a human being must be recognized as having the rights of a person - among which is the inviolable right of every innocent being to life." (CCC 2270)

Here's an excellent article setting things straight for those wondering why a self-proclaimed Catholic like Speaker Pelosi could be getting so much heat from bloggers to bishops. I'll use the same excerpt that Ignatius Insight used:

People — including apparently some “ardent” Catholics — seem to forget how central the pro-life issue is to Catholic morality and why that is so. We are not quibbling here about how many angels can dance on the head of a pin. It is no exaggeration to say that the inviolability and sacredness of innocent human life is to Catholic morality what the doctrine of the Holy Trinity is to Catholic dogma. Both are not only non-negotiable; they are foundational. I would challenge Speaker Pelosi to come up with any moral question on which the Church has expressed itself with greater clarity than on the intrinsic evil of abortion.

A solid core of beliefs or principles undergirds any human organization. These beliefs constitute the cement that binds the society together and determine its identity. Obviously plenty of issues fall outside this fundamental core, and there is a difference between legitimate pluralism of opinion and arrant contradiction. Environmentalists, for example, can disagree about many things — such as strategies, priorities, tactics, funding and the like — but devotion to the environment and its logical corollaries are not up for debate. If you sport a mink coat, you’re out of the club.

Being Catholic is no different. The title “Catholic” presumes a whole string of basic beliefs, succinctly laid out in the Apostle’s Creed. Catholics believe in one God, creator of heaven and earth, in Jesus Christ his only begotten son who became man, suffered and died for us, rose from the dead on the third day, and so forth. Along with this canon of doctrines, Catholics also embrace a body of moral teaching (summed up tidily in the Catechism of the Catholic Church) which governs their understanding of right and wrong, what is pleasing to God and what offends Him.

From the earliest days of Christianity, Jesus’ followers distinguished themselves from those around them both by their doctrinal beliefs and their moral code. The earliest known work of Christian antiquity outside the New Testament is called The Teaching of the Twelve Apostles, known also by its familiar Greek appellation, the Didache. This catechetical manual makes no bones about what it means to be a Christian. It begins with the stark admonition: “Two ways there are, one of Life and one of Death, and there is a great difference between the Two Ways.” Included in the explanation of what it means to love one’s neighbor, as part of the “way of life,” first century Christians read the words, “Do not kill a fetus by abortion, or commit infanticide.” Such has been the consistent teaching throughout the history of Christianity and no amount of political posturing will change that.

Some people think that when Catholics compare abortion to slavery or to Nazi anti-Semitism they are engaging in hyperbole. They couldn’t be more wrong. Abortion is not only the greatest social injustice of our century; it is arguably the greatest social injustice of all time. Abortion circumscribes an entire class of human beings (the unborn) as non-citizens, excluded from the basic rights and protections accorded to all other human beings. In this way abortion mimics the great moral tragedies of all time, which always began with the denigration of an entire class of people as unworthy of life or freedom.

The evil of abortion is compounded by the magnitude of the problem. Though completely reliable statistics are unavailable, conservative estimates place the number of legal abortions performed worldwide each year at 25-30 million, a figure that alone makes abortion a social problem of staggering proportions. “Humanity today offers us a truly alarming spectacle,” wrote Pope John Paul in his 1995 encyclical letter Evangelium Vitae, “if we consider not only how extensively attacks on life are spreading but also their unheard of numerical proportion.” The legal, systematic elimination of the most vulnerable members of society is the most heinous crime known to man. To fail to oppose it is to make oneself complicit in it.

Summer's Winding Down . . .

2008-08-26T17:53:00.004-05:00

So, it's been two months since I posted. Yep, pretty status quo around here. ;) Just wanted to post a couple of pics of the kiddos from earlier in the summer so I feel as if I have contributed something to this blog recently. It's pictures like this that would make you think life is peachy-keen around here 24/7. Ha, ha. Doesn't she look as if she simply adores him?!

In all honesty, these two do have some really cute, touching moments of hugging, sharing, instructing one another and exhibiting virtues we try hard to pass down to them (with varying levels of success). Then, we have those days where someone is squealing, hitting, pushing and pointing fingers at the other every other minute. I mean it too, they really do literally hold up fingers and point at one another with furrowed eyebrows and mean faces! When I am not angry about it myself, it is a funny sight.

Here's another one from that night on our deck . . .

Hopefully, I will have a few more after I download pictures from our camera. But who knows when that is going to happen. ;) Overall, we had a pretty fun and busy summer . . . I still can't believe it is the end of August!

Cavan's verbal quirks

2008-07-28T12:28:00.003-05:00

It seems somewhat ironic that a choral director (who has to insist on good diction and pronunciation) and a speech therapist should have a child who struggles so mightily with certain sounds. Being so young, it actually doesn't bother us a bit, though we'll have to figure out a plan of action if it continues for the next few years. : ) And on the contrary, we actually enjoy his inability to pronounce certain sounds, as it often elicits delight on the part of his parents.

Cavan struggles with (or used to struggle with) the following sounds:

S (often used "F" instead)
G (uses "D" instead)
K (uses "T" instead)
Th (uses "F" instead)
V (uses "B" instead)

These mispronunciations have created so many wonderful words and phrases, that I must commit them to posterity.

"Taa-vuhn" ("Cavan")

"Oh . . . I faw-wee" ("Oh . . . I'm sorry.")

"Dood" ("Good")

"Taws" ("Cars")

"Tew-win" ("Kellyn")

"I fawt you wuz a-sweep" ("I thought you were asleep")

"Is dat tuw-wuh?" ("Is that cool?")

"Intwedibuh Hutt" ("Incredible Hulk")

"Tweem . . . Bitamins . . . Tweem . . . Bitamins . . . " ("Cream . . . Vitamins . . . ") (He said this once with each in his hand and apparently deliberating about which to use.)

"Doh, Tubs, Doh" ("Go, Cubs, Go")

"Dwamaw Debby" ("Grandma Debby")

"Pawt" ("Park")

"Twih-twee" ("Quickly")

We often ask leading questions to elicit some of these responses . . . makes for a good time when we're bored around the house. : )

Academic Statistics on Homeschooling

2008-07-02T14:30:00.001-05:00

Couldn't let this one go by without a post.

Link

The Business of Being Born

2008-06-24T11:14:00.002-05:00

As many of you know, our daughter was born at our previous home in May of 2006. After having a cesarean with Cavan, I knew there had to be a better way to birth . . . and there is!!! Ladies, I am here to tell you . . . STAY HOME. ;)

Of course, I fully realize and acknowledge that homebirth is not for everyone, so many of you may be laughing out loud and/or rolling your eyes at me. I know, I know . . . I am some radical, loony, hippie mom who wants to birth her babies in her backyard. ;) However, I feel compelled to spread the news because so many women do not even realize homebirth is still an option. Unfortunately for women, two major medical associations are trying to ENSURE that it is NOT an option for women. Yep, you heard me right! The American Medical Association (AMA) and the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG) have issued a statement against "home deliveries". (As if birthing at home is the same as getting pizza delivered to your home! I could go on about the terminology of "delivery" but I will save that for another time.) So now physicians are attempting to literally dictate where women should birth their babies. Considering maternity wards are typically the "cash cow" of hospitals, it doesn't surprise me that these physicians have taken such a strong stance on location of births. They obviously have a vested financial interest to protect (more birthing mamas = more interventions = more beds filled = more babies in the hospital = more money).

I don't mean to sound cynical. The doctors may just be feeling defensive from all the recent midwifery campaigning and homebirth media. Ricki Lake recently made a movie, "The Business of Being Born" in which she shows several women birthing at home and the differences experienced while in the hospital. I have yet to see this film but would love to do so! I know it is available on Netflix, but I heard a local video store in town is also carrying it, so it may be a family movie night soon! ;) Even though I have not viewed the film myself, I have heard rave reviews. So, if you have Netflix or some extra time on your hands, give it a shot. You may be surprised by what you see in the movie.

There is also a campaign going on across the country to legalize Direct Entry Midwives (DEMs) as Certified Professional Midwives (CPMs). Many states already have licensure available for CPMs, but many do not. And of those states without licensure, there is usually some MAJOR persecution of midwives who are practicing "underground". Illinois has legislation introduced, but you know if I already pestered you last year for support, that getting a bill passed is a LONG process and ours is still in progress. You can find out more at www.thebigpushformidwives.org and for Illinois specifically, www.homebirthishealthy.org.

Now, I can sympathize with doctors. I can see why they are feeling pressure and why they feel the need to "fight back". I can also understand why many of them with solely a medical background truly believe in their heart of hearts that homebirth is not safe. I can appreciate the fact that many of them really do believe mothers and babies are being put at risk in this antiquated form of birth. But I do NOT believe that gives them the right to tell me where and how I should birth. Especially given the fabulous outcome I experienced using the medical system with Cavan. I will not subject myself or future babies to the hospital experience again, unless there is a true emergency or complication.

If I could speak to the physicians, I would remind them that statistics don't lie. Multiple studies have shown that homebirth is just as safe (often with far fewer interventions for mom and baby than their hospital counterparts) as a hospital birth when it is planned by a healthy, low-risk pregnant woman. I would invite them to attend some live homebirths and see how peaceful they can be. I would encourage them to actually speak one-to-one with some homebirth mamas and those who have had negative hospital experiences.

I realize I won't change their minds, but I do feel it is important for them to honestly look at the other side. For Ricki Lake's (and her producer's) response to the AMA and ACOG statements dismissing homebirths, go here:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/ricki-lake-jennifer-block-and-abby-epstein/docs-to-women-pay-no-atte_b_107845.html

It is important for us, particularly birthing women, to remember that in a healthcare system, WE are the consumers. The patients are the consumers of a product. So, take it seriously. Ask questions. Know the benefits and risks of every procedure or option. Read up on things and educate yourself. Be informed so you can truly make an educated decision. No one else is looking out for your health as much as YOU are.