Catholic Confusion

As I mentioned earlier, we are trying (some days struggling) to get into the habit of a family rosary at night (an abridged version due to the young ages of our children). One thing that has impressed me is how many of the mysteries Cavan does retain, and Kellyn too if she can see a picture. Heck, I didn't even know all of them until college and every now and then, I still have to stop and think about the order of some in the Sorrowful and Luminous vein!

Well, a couple of weeks ago, we were meditating on the Sorrowful Mysteries. For those who are not Catholic or those who have forgotten, here is the rundown:
1) Agony in the Garden
2) Scourging at the Pillar
3) Crowning with Thorns
4) Carrying of the Cross
5) Crucifixion

We were on the first mystery, one of my favorites to meditate upon as it highlights so much of the human side of Jesus, as well as complete submission to God's will in the end. When we talk about this mystery with Cavan and Kellyn, we use one picture which shows an angel at the side of Jesus. So, on this particular night:

Me: Kellyn, what happened in the first Sorrowful Mystery?
Kellyn: Ummm (looking down at the necklace in her hand) . . .
Me: Here, sweetie, look at the picture.
Kellyn: Ummm . . . an angel came . . .
Me: Yes . . .
Kellyn: An angel came to Jesus . . . and said "You're going to have a baby!" (with a smile beaming from her face in pride of her accomplishment)

The First Joyful Mystery is the Annunciation when an angel appeared to Mary and announced that she had conceived a child. Ah, so many angels and too little time to remember what happened when . . . .

Reflections on a citation . . .

. . . a speeding citation that is. On Holy Thursday, as I was driving to work, I got pulled over on University Avenue for doing 40mph in a 30mph zone.

I was going too fast and I got caught . . . the fault lies with me completely and totally. Nevertheless, as I was getting written up, a series of thoughts passed through my mind:

--I'm a bit frustrated with our speeding laws and their enforcement. First off, the phrase "speed limit" seems to indicate that that speed is the absolute highest you can go without being punished. And yet, I've never been pulled over for going 31 in in a 30 zone. Or even 35 . . . they should rename them "speed guidelines" or "speed suggestions."

And so from a officer's perspective, they must have an arbitrary number in their head at which they'll pull you over. For example, in a 30mph zone, maybe an officer won't pull you over unless you're going at least 38. But another officer may let you go 41 before he pulls you over. The trouble with this is that drivers aren't really sure how fast they can go before being punished.

--Another problem is the enormous waste of time the whole process necessitates. It seems that the average speeding stop lasts at least 20 minutes. It takes so durn long to write the actual citation . . . man, think of the loss to the economy of all the countless hours wasted while waiting to be "rung up."

--The inconsistency on the part of our law enforcement can be a problem as well. For instance, there must be a ton of factors an officer takes into account when he is discerning whether or not to pull someone over. "Is this person going over my arbitrary speed "limit"?" "Do I really feel like hassling with this person and writing up another stinkin' citation today?" "I'm off in ten minutes . . . do I want to work an extra 15 minutes to ticket this guy?" "If I do pull him over, will I write him a ticket or just a warning?" "Have I met my quota for the month?" (NB I had always heard that you're more likely to get a ticket at the end of the month when an officer needs to make his "quota" . . . does anyone know if there is any validity to this? I really don't know . . . )

In other words, officers are making some disciplinary mistakes that I could never endorse if this was a parent/child situation (officers as parents/disciplinarians, drivers as children/disciplinees(?)): 1) Not making the boundaries clear (arbitrary speed limits) and 2) Not giving consistent discipline when that boundary has been crossed. It makes for a very frustrating situation for all parties.


Solutions . . . hmm. In the ideal world (one in which I am the supreme head of all things), the following would happen:

--Make actual speed limits and enforce them. Bump all of them up a bit and then make it clear that this is a real limit . . . if you go even one mile over the limit, you will be cited (no warnings either: you break the law, you pay).

--Shorten the amount of time for a traffic stop. A few things could be changed: 1) Speeding laws are enforced with technology (radars, cameras, tickets automatically mailed to your home) or, if the human element is necessary, 2) Have something in place that can transmit electronically most of the information needed on the ticket (e.g. a button could be pushed that would use a GPS system to register the time, the location, date, etc. so the officer wouldn't have to write it). A stop shouldn't take more than five minutes, in my book.

Also, could we just pay the ticket right then and there with a credit card? : )


A final anecdote: As I was preparing to pay this last ticket, I made a phone call to the city to see if I could take one of those Driver Safety classes and get the ticket expunged from my record. I had done this back when we lived in Chicago, and though I had to pay a bit extra and spend a Saturday morning sitting through the excruciating class, the ticket was left off my record and didn't affect my insurance premium. Anyway, the person informed me that as long as it had been at least four years since I had taken the class, I could take it again.

I dug up my old workbook that still had my certificate in it . . . and it turns out that I had finished the class in May 2005.

I got this last ticket in April 2009. 3 years and 11 months later.

Crap.

(Update: I would hate for the above to be construed as I'm unjustly criticizing our law enforcement. I'm actually very appreciative for the feeling of safety my family and I have due to the presence of the police in our city/state/country. This post was only to point out an area that a fresh perspective could provide some food for thought. And I'm quick to add that I've never actually talked about any of the above with an actual officer of the law, who is sure to have more insight into the matter than myself.)

DebtDebtDebtDebtDebtDebt . . .

Sorry kids, Daddy will be dead/retired when you have to pay all this back . . .







Tx to Jimmy Akin

Fun sites

Two new sites I came across recently through colleagues, which have been a lot of fun for the kids and I:

1) www.tarheelreader.org

A site designed, I believe, for older students who struggle with reading at an elementary level, it's been used quite a bit for young beginners as well. You can search for photos, put a caption for each, and make your own story. Cavan's been doing a nice job reading quite a few all by himself, and it's a great way to learn new vocabulary, as he is good to ask us when he doesn't know a word.

Also, we've been using quite a few from the "Latin" section. He's gaining quite a bit of Latin vocab from some of the easier ones (with me reading and helping to translate, of course), such as this one:

http://tarheelreader.org/2009/05/21/de-bestiis-variis/


2) www.makebeliefscomix.org (carefully note the spelling)

You can make your own simple comic strips! You only have a few images to choose from, but you can give characters their own talk bubble and type in anything. It's been a lot of fun for Cavan, as he is getting better at manipulating the images and exploring the different options. He dictates and I type for him, which fosters a bit of creativity on his part. This is our finest collaboration, thus far:

http://www.makebeliefscomix.com/Comix/?comix_id=2853434C108202

Pray for Your Persecutors

Thanks to a local Catholic homeschooling group, we are getting into the habit of saying a family rosary every night. This is an abridged version (1 Our Father, 1 Hail Mary and 1 Glory Be) as our kids are not-quite 5 years, 3 years and 2 months old. So, we take what we can get and hope they are soaking up some of the faith in our imperfect execution. ;)

Before the rosary, we always go around and individual family members have the option of offering up intentions or stating whom they would like to pray for that evening. Sometimes the children have adorable offerings, sometimes they have none and sometimes they are interesting. A couple of weeks ago, Cavan was praying for different family members and Kellyn was having a fiery attitude (as is often the case when she doesn't nap . . . why don't I enforce those more regularly???).

Cavan: I'd like to pray for . . . um . . . Sebastian . . .
Kellyn: (with a slight wine) Noooo . . .
Me: He can pray for Sebastian if he wants to. Go ahead, Cavan.
Cavan: Um . . . and Tewyn (i.e. Kellyn) . . .
Kellyn: (with the shrillest scream) NOOOO!!!! NOOO!!! NOOO!!
Me: Kellyn, calm down, he was just praying for you.
Kellyn: (with furrowed eyebrows and a gruff, mean face to her older brother) Next time, you-- don't--PWAY FOR ME!!!

Ah, the lessons of Jesus within family prayer time . . .

Parenting Wisdom by Cavan Isaiah

I am continually amazed by the number of questions and comments our Cavan (who was a late talker) throws at me in one day. Last week, while I was nursing Sebastian and he was looking a bit pensive on the couch, he stated:

Cavan: Mom...
Me: Yes, Cav?
Cavan: Mamas put der (their) babies in swings (he means "slings") and the babies det happy and the babies doh (go) to sweep (sleep).

Just shy of 5 years old, this kid has already figured out one of the oldest parenting tricks in the book! Yay for babywearing. ;)

Homeschooling/socialization

Interesting, yet not surprising, at least in my eyes . . .

Homeschooling and Socialization

"What about the socialization?" One occasionally hears this question with regard to homeschooling.

Here's a quote from psychology professor Richard G. Medlin's article, "Home Schooling and the Question of Socialization," Peabody Journal of Education, Vol. 75 (2000): 107-23.

Shyers (1992a, 1992b), in the most thorough study of home-schooled children's social behavior to date, tested 70 children who had been entirely home-schooled and 70 children who had always attended traditional schools. The two groups were matched in age (all were 8-10 years old), race, gender, family size, socioeconomic status, and number and frequency of extracurricular activities. Shyers measured self-concept and assertiveness and found no significant differences between the two groups.

The most intriguing part of the study, however, involved observing the children as they played and worked together. Small groups of children who all had the same school background were videotaped while playing in a large room equipped with toys such as puzzles, puppets, and dolls. The children were then videotaped again in a structured activity: working in teams putting puzzles together for prizes.

Each child's behavior was rated by two observers who did not know whether the children they were rating were home-schooled or traditionally schooled. The observers used the Direct Observation Form of the Child Behavior Checklist . . . , a checklist of 97 problem behaviors such as argues, brags or boasts, doesn't pay attention long, cries, disturbs other children, isolates self from others, shy or timimd, and shows off. The results were striking -- the mean problem behavior score for children attending conventional schools was more than eight times higher than that of the home-schooled group. Shyers (1992a) described the traditionally schooled children as "aggressive, loud, and competitive" (p. 6). In contrast, the home-schooled children acted in friendly, positive ways.

Link

Girl Talk by Kellyn Margaret

Some interesting quotes from Kellyn lately. . .

In our parenting, we use the anatomically correct names for body parts. I believe in teaching our children what the parts of their body are actually called. The other day was one time that I maybe wished we had a "code" word. While we were at the library (a very quiet environment), Kellyn says in a not so quiet voice:

"Mom, I have a vagina and you have a vagina 'cuz we're girls, right?"

As I was getting dressed a few days ago, Kellyn was watching me and asked "What's that?" I answered, "A bra." She said, "Oh" and then paused. Next she says:

"When I get bigger and my nursies get bigger, I want a pink bra, okay?"

I don't like that she is already asking for colored undergarments. ;)

And lastly, today she was following Cavan around.

Cavan: Tew (Kell), why are you fowowing (following) me?
Kellyn: Because I wuv you.

It's moments like those that I cherish. ;) I pray they remain close as adults.

Can you tell that they're related?

Cavan on the bottom, Sebastian on the top (why can't I get these stinkin' pictures to lay out the way I want them to?!?). We should try to get Sebastian in a pose that mirrors one of Cavan's at the same age . . . then we could really compare!